Tag Archive | "drinking"

Get Drunk… It’s for the Children!


A lot of different communities have started a recycling program, commonly called “Cans for Kids.” The concept is to collect and recycle aluminum cans and have the proceeds go towards things such as children’s education.

Many of these programs have had a significant impact on education, providing college scholarships, funding arts programs and providing better quality education materials. Read the full story

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Frumpy Reclusive Woman Blossoms at Local Drinking Establishment


ANN ARBOR, Michigan (GlossyNews) — The hare lip on 50 year old Mavis Blakely’s face was very large and the sight of it scared many eligible suitors away from her in her lifetime. Many thought it prevented her from living an otherwise normal life. But Mavis claims it has helped greatly in other ways…

“Through the years I’ve saved over 300 innocent lives by preventing very drunk guys from driving home after the bars close,” claims Mavis. Her gestures with a lit cigarette left trails of smoke rings around her red hair, as her eyes flitted around the dim bar. Read the full story

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College Freshman and Brewing Company Discover Social Anxiety Disorder Cure


LOS ANGELES, CA — Martin Freneticksburg, a college freshman, found himself diagnosed with social anxiety disorder last September after he pledged to a fraternity only to crumble under the ridicule and embarrassment of the customary hazing. Martin is not alone. Doctors say this experience is becoming more common in young adults, especially females. Read the full story

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Posted in Human Interest, ScienceComments (1)

Alcohol ‘Protects Men’s Hearts’, Jokes Included


After hearing – and reading – so much crap for so long – that alcohol stuffs up your liver, brain cells, memory, gives you gout, causes stomach ulcers, Diabetes B – Mk 1, 2 and 3 varieties, and a plethora of other internal and external physical nasties – plus a few psychotic problems such as hallucinations, delirium tremens, galloping paranoia and psychopathic tendencies – our esteemed government are now pronouncing it’s actually quite good for you – to the extent of – and here we quote – “it protects men’s hearts”. Read the full story

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Ask Hank: My Lousy Husband


Dear Hank,

I’m a happily married 48 year old woman with a wonderful husband and five great kids.

But something’s bothering me. For the last six months my husband has been coming home late several nights a week with liquor on his breath, his suit disheveled, lipstick stains on his shirt, and nasty looking welts on his neck. Read the full story

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Posted in SocietyComments (2)

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