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BP Oil Reaches Five Flags Pensacola, Danica Patrick Spins Out, Obviously

   Published Date: July 14, 2010  2 Comments on BP Oil Reaches Five Flags Pensacola, Danica Patrick Spins Out, Obviously

The oil gusher in the Gulf of Mexico has spread east as far as Pensacola, Florida, where the Five Flags race track is located. In response, noted NASCAR also-ran and female driver Danica Patrick showed her solidarity for her suffering Gulf co-victims, promptly spun out and wrecked her car into the barricade.

There were no serious injuries, though many fans still hold out hope.

Author: Brian White

Brian first began peddling his humorous wares with a series of Xerox printed books in fifth grade. Since then he's published over two thousand satire and humor articles, as well as eight stage plays, a 13-episode cable sitcom and three (terrible) screenplays. He is a freelance writer by trade and an expert in the field of viral entertainment marketing. He is the author of many of the biggest hoaxes of recent years, a shameful accomplishment in which he takes exceptional pride.

2 thoughts on “BP Oil Reaches Five Flags Pensacola, Danica Patrick Spins Out, Obviously”

  1. Any man with Danica’s record wouldn’t even be mentioned by her biggest cheerleaders, the ESPN, FOX and TNT talking heads. She is in WAY over her head, ask Kurt Busch if you don’t believe me.

  2. What a total and pointless load of crap the above article is.
    An expert in entertainment maybe, but clearly an ignorant dumb ass when it comes to motorsport.
    And quite sick as well judging by the last sentence.

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