Categorized | Sports Events, World News

Brazil’s Economy Skyrockets in Soccer Tournament; Millions of Wallets Stolen

Brazil’s Economy Skyrockets in Soccer Tournament; Millions of Wallets Stolen

The 2014 FIFA World Cup event will be a beneficial factor that will help Brazil with its not-so-good economy, at least that’s what Hispanic skinhead, Pitbull, had to say about it.

Hispanic, cancer man later went on to gibber on how mysteriously wallets were being stolen from foreigners. After questioned if this was the work of his 370 little, Hispanic children army, domestic violence father responded by nervously chuckling and securing the closet in which one child was hanging from a rope.

We also talked one on one about his shitty music, but sadly no words were able to get to his ears with all of that ego getting in the way.

This interview was getting nowhere and we had skipped lunch thanks to this no good Hispanic Walter White. A maid, working for Pitbull, approached us and asked if we would like some water. Mr. White interrupted by yelling, “Dale!” When all hope seemed lost, he finally started talking.

“Now listen here, I am very fed up with you talking shit about my music like that. I work very hard to make these tracks. I’m no Nickelback. And another thing too is that this soccer tournament will help those little African children in getting some decent food.”

But was it really all that easy? I mean, yes, stealing a few thousand wallets can provide you with some good meals, but is that enough? Is it ever enough? Couldn’t these African children just go to their old ways and “scooter-by” pedestrians as the back thug shoots, and his homosexual lover drives him off, and both then fading away into the sunset?

Regardless of their choices, one thing is for sure for these African children in Brazil; nothing.

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