In a stunning admission the International Olympic Committee issued a statement today confirming Curling was added to be more inclusive to non-athletes.
The IOC had come under fire for its wall-to-wall coverage of this years Curling competition, many times at the expense of more popular sports such as hockey and downhill skiing. The move elicited a collective WHAT THE FUCK from much of the civilized sporting world.
The statement read “For decades the Olympics has been criticized for not being more inclusive of non-athletes. Traditional events freeze the sedentary and talent-less out of participation. The committee felt the addition of one event that required little skill, no athleticism and relied more on luck then ability would be more reflective of current sentiments and politically correct objectives.”
“We discussed several alternatives including tiddly winks, checkers, beer pong, but landed on Curling since it was more visually attractive and takes place on an ice rink, which of course is topical to the theme of the Winter Olympics.”
In other news, the IOC is currently discussing eliminating the awarding of medals and instead sending all athletes greeting cards that say “Thanks for participating, you were great!”