The Vatican Office have confirmed that Pope Francis is due to make a public announcement tomorrow on his controversial college, as discussed an hour ago on Glossy News. The St Francis School of New Theological Justice has already drawn a degree of controversy for such mildly idiosyncratic study module choices as:
Is Marxism a Heresy? What Most Christians Never Tell You About Radical Economic Justice
The Saviour of All People: Exposing and Refuting Islamophobic Theology and its Misguided Apologists
Manspreading the Gospel: How the Trivialization of Microaggressions Makes a Scandal of Our Church
Apparently it was his idea; in confidence, what we can tell you, our loyal readers, is that the Holy Father is very proud that the prestigious new college for the future leaders of the Church is already getting some attention.
“Our Holy Father,” I am told, “Is following the example of Jesus, the apostles, and the prophets (Jewish and otherwise): No News is Bad News! When it comes to spreading the Gospel, and educating the masses of our believers, there is truly no such thing as a bad news report!”
Sadly, some of the clergy and laity seem to disagree.
One priest, who asked not to be named, said:
These are the most long-winded and tedious course titles I have ever heard. Still: I never thought I would say this, but imprecise and vague language is the least of our worries right now! It seems the Church has become a mouthpiece for pretty much any PC SJW deviation under the sun.
Well, this is certainly not what I bought into when I was first ordained 20 years ago. I had always thought, at least here, I would be safe from the intellectual garbage flooding our universities here in California.
No such luck!
Our usual confidential Vatican source (see the article from an hour ago) was indisposed, so we asked our alternative confidential Vatican source from Brazil to comment on these words instead.
But as our Portuguese is still not quite perfect, all we could make out was that it was some kind of angry tirade about “intolerant, exclusionary clerics,” and… “the very reason Our Lord is having to bleed and die in the first place; because of hateful clerics who refuse to celebrate theological diversity!”
We hope for more clarification next week on this story.