Forget the overly cheery Christmas carols, the endless gift shopping and the eye strainingly gaudy seasonal decorations. Cheery days aside, the world is falling apart.
In that spirit, it is time for some truly low-brow, rude, raunchy and definitely non-Christmasy jokes.
Anyway, here goes:
Why do blondes make lousy suicide bombers?
They insist on doing a test run.
Why does it always take two blondes to detonate a suicide bomb?
The wearer has to hold the jacket open to make sure it doesn’t interfere while the other pushes the trigger.
Why do blonde suicide bombers always work in threes?
One has to hold the jacket open, one has to push the button and the third to watch the other two to make sure they do it right.
Why did the blonde suicide bomber only succeed at blowing up himself when he set off the bomb under his coat?
It was a reversible jacket.
What do you get when you combine a blonde suicide bomber with a Barbie?
A blow up sex doll.
Why was the blonde suicide bomber not in the mood when he got to heaven and met his 76 virgins?
He was all in pieces over the experience.
SIDE NOTE: Congress, Detroit and Illinois should take note- The Suicide Bombers Union has no problem what-so-ever with their retirement pension fund. Whatever they do to have such success with this should be investigated and put to use in their own problem-ridden funds.