ACROSS THE NATION—Upon arriving at their parents’ house, sources confirmed they were greeted by their mother with the words, “Glad to see you made it. We’re always hearing about vehicle recalls on the news and you never know what might happen, what with people’s brakes failing left and right and whatnot.”
Mere seconds after additional sources walked in the front door for Thanksgiving, the sources’ father, Vernon, said, “Do you know how many houses burned down last year alone from ovens just like that? Terrible.”
RIGHT: Image by Jon Pinder via Flickr (CLICK TO ENLARGE)
The sources’ father, whom they referred to as “Dad” amongst themselves and “our dad” when speaking to those outside the family, also made mention of the massive storm sweeping across the country.
As a Cleveland source sat with relatives watching the local news before eating, his parents said without being asked, “You know our friends the Petersons? Last week, a tree fell down right into their living room. Can you imagine that? Their living room. It’s a miracle they weren’t in there when it happened.”
Moments before starting the meal, Wichita-area mother Mary Thatcher said “I hope this turkey had enough time to cook. You know, my friend June got horrible food poisoning last Thanksgiving. Fever, vomiting, diarrhea. Just horrible.”
Thatcher family sources were also able to confirm that after a few moments of silence, their father looked around the table as if perplexed and asked why everyone looked so depressed.
After the meal, while one of the Thatcher sources was walking out the door, she told her parents she was going to a cookout the following weekend. As she walked further away, her mother’s voice became more and more faint. However, she could distinctly make out the words “mad cow disease.”