Sarah Palin Attempts to Crash Clinton Wedding

WASILLY, Alaska (Glossy News) — In a scene right out of The Real Housewives of New York, Sarah Palin had her bus driver drive her bus (he drove, she and Todd flew via private jet) all the way across country and into the tiny town of Rhinebeck, NY to find out why they weren’t on the guest list of the biggest American wedding this side of the 60’s.

Witnesses claim they saw Palin’s “Going Rogue” bus drive up and down the streets of Rhinebeck in what they could only surmise was an attempt to find out exactly where to turn into the private drive of the Astor Courts Estate. With GPS systems jammed in the area and security extremely tight, anyone not on the guest list was sent on a wild goose chase to try and find the place.

Service Station owner, David Hangaright claims that the bus stopped at his pumps and a frantic Sarah Palin entered his convenience store asking for directions. “I know she wasn’t telling the truth when she asked what was the quickest way to get to the little Clinton shindig that was going on today,” said Hangaright. “I asked to see her invitation and she told me that it was in the bus, and then she huffed away and said she’d find the friggin’ place herself.”

Unable to find their way to the wedding, the Palins left a gift for the young couple at a local Denny’s as a gesture of good will. It appeared to be several autographed copies of Palin’s books.

Meanwhile, Tareq and Michaele Salahi were caught trying to crash the wedding as well. The Salahis are said to have gotten past the first gate, but security guards at the final entrance to the estate became suspicious as Michaele and Tareq tried to explain why Michaele was wearing an exact replica of Chelsea Clinton’s wedding dress. “Oh that,” said Michaele, “wherever we go, we try and blend in.”

Author: P. Beckert

P. Beckert's is one voice vying for frequency room at the top of the opinion dial. Angered and bewildered by many of today’s events, P. Beckert uses humor as a tool to fight against an onslaught of stupidity and ignorance that seems to permeate the airwaves and pollute the sensitivities of a once brilliant nation. You can find more at

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