Posted on November 08, 2009. Tags: bachelor blues, bad advice, drinking problems, hemlock, poison, self-doubt, suicide
Posted by Ask Hank
Hey Hank,
Sometimes it feels like everything around me is going wrong, like my family hates me, like I’ll never get married, and like I’ll never have kids or become a real man. Can you suggest what drink would go best with my sorrow?
Respect,
-Suffering in Sacremende
Dear Suffering,
Hemlock.
-Hank
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This post was written by Ask Hank
Ask Hank - who has written 22 posts on GlossyNews.com.
Hank hails from Pocatello, Idaho, better known as Big Elk Country. For years now, Hank has been the guy to ask for advice on any subject. From what wine to serve at your next exotic meat party to where to take your date hunting, Hank knows it all, and he’s willing to share it with you. Ask him anything, and if he can’t come up with an answer on his own, he’s got a whole slew of experts on hand to help him out. From big game hunting, to decorating your man space, to how to keep the wife happy, ask Hank. He’ll tell it like it is.
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Dear Hank,
All due respect, but I think you missed your calling. You could be, hands down, the world’s most sought-out bartender.
I would have gone for a more modern Greek drink, Ouzo on the Rocks. Which I find helps me out with these very same symptoms. Time and again.
But you went right for the perfect-ending drink, hemlock. Damn, man, that’s brilliance in bartending.
Thanks again. Bobz