GOP Leader Tells Cancer Victim to “Beg for Charity”

US House Minority Whip Eric Cantor (R-Va.) wins the award for Scumbag Politician of the Week – a widely contested prize around Congress these past few years – with both Democrats and Republics running neck and neck in the qualifying heats.

However Cantor took first place in the contest with ease when he told a Richmond woman – one of his own GOP-voting constituents suffering with stomach cancer – she should be out on the streets begging for money to pay for her treatment if she didn’t have medical insurance.

So here for us all to survey and learn by is the Cantor Plan for unemployed zero income Americans who may have lost their health insurance after being laid off by a company whose CEO is still making a million dollars per annum thanks to taxpayer-funded government bailouts.

First she should sell all of her lifetime possessions to pay her ridiculously-inflated medical costs – with the side benefit that this would make her a poverty-stricken and homeless derelict – and thus she would therefore qualify for health programs for the poor that the majority of Republican Congressmen and Senators don’t support.

It was at this juncture certain critics commented that if the woman was unemployed, homeless and penniless – and dying of cancer to boot – then she was the ideal candidate for our compassionate government to give up on as being of no further use to society and would only constitute a burden to the Medicare system.

Several suggestions were fielded that she take to the city streets in her best hooker dress and flog her golly to pay for her treatment.
However if that plan of action failed, Cantor advised the woman to get on out and around with a begging bowl and a “Dying of Cancer’ sign hung round her neck – and play on human sympathy. Yes “Sympathy” – an odd word that’s in the dictionary somewhere between ‘Shit’ and ‘Syphilis’.

So Eric Cantor’s scheme is a spin-off of the biblical injunction to sell your possessions and give the proceeds to the poor – but in this scenario you sell your possessions to become poor – nice one – very original – while the wealth is kept by those who profit handsomely from the healthcare system.

Oh well, for a pro-Zionist who canvasses all-out support for Israel on the one hand and condemns aid in any form for a war-ravaged Palestine on the other, does anyone actually expect Cantor to promote benevolent charity to be doled out for those cast into the twilight fringes of the social spectrum?

Author: Rusty

Rusty's Skewed News Views are spoof publications, fired by the ironies of human nature and tempered with elements of satire and parody, and should not, therefore, be taken too seriously. These are inspired by traveling around the Earth more times than Skylab and composed while observing the inherent idiocies of Mankind. Thus lawyers be duly advised : All libel writs issued on behalf of offended humourless ego's and / or those blighted by unqualified arrogance herein lampooned may be addressed to : Rusty the Boddington's Badger, Igloo 27, Pasquinade Gardens, Penguin Parade, Ross Ice Shelf, Antarctica - or via

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