Scientists Discover World’s First Solid Rainbow!

Image source: Pixabay

Scientists have long been of the consensus that the technicolour semi-circles that often appear in the sky during times of precipitation are nothing more than refractions of light off raindrops. But now all those years of research could be shattered after a seemingly solid rainbow was found protruding out of a shed in a northern Englishman’s back garden. Researchers from some of the world’s top universities flocked to the small village of Botton in North Yorkshire to get to the bottom of this revelation.

Long-time rainbow researcher Richard Bowman from Stanford University fled to England upon hearing of the supposedly solid rainbow in Peter Pemberton’s garden. The man behind the acclaimed thesis that tore apart the lyrics of Over the Rainbow from the Wizard of Oz was joined by other scientists from the University of Oxford and the University of Manchester. None of the academics in attendance wanted news of this revelation to reach the mainstream. Not only would it shatter a lot of their previous work, but it could also have chaotic ramifications in the future.

According to Manchester-based scientist Phil Reed, “Rainbows have long held a magical image in popular culture, one which science doesn’t want to blow apart. People play Rainbow Riches slots and other made-up games in the knowledge that rainbows don’t actually have a pot of gold at the end of them in reality. That’s what makes the fantasy games so enjoyable. If solid rainbows were found to be real, every man and his dog would be walking to the end of them looking for mischievous leprechauns.”

At the site of the occurrence, the scientists set about gathering information while Pemberton stood about in awe. “I’m still in complete shock. I can’t quite believe this has happened in my garden,” the retired plumber said to reporters on the scene.

After conducting extensive research, Bowman met reporters to give a full statement:

“It seemed that the actual reason for the small rainbow was down to the fact that the homeowner had been melting down large amounts of hundreds and thousands along with icing sugar and various sweet sauces in his garden. The reason for this is currently unknown. This gooey mess had formed a multi-coloured puddle on the ground which then evaporated, creating candy floss-like clouds in the local area. When rain fell down from these colourful fluffy formations, the combination of melted sweets fell back down to Earth. The sticky drops hit the ground in a perfect arch formation thanks to a light easterly breeze and the rainbow formed because the drops instantly solidified upon landing.”

Soon after the dubious report was given, the area was closed off by scientists. Members of the media were no longer allowed anywhere near the site. It certainly raised the question as to whether the scientists were telling the truth or not. Some people have suggested that they may have embarked on a journey to the other end of the rainbow themselves to see if there is a pot of gold there.

Author: Dexter Sinistri

Dexter Sinistri is a famously centrist writer who has worked as a Hollywood correspondent for a number of leading publications since 2005. Though once a photographer, Mr. Sinistri struck out as a writer on all things celebrity, and he likes to consider himself a tremendous asset to Glossy News, though by most accounts, he has fallen somewhat short of this effort.