Benton, AR – (Glossy News) WalMart retailers across the US are all set to stock The Nobel Peace Prize on their store shelves in time for the Christmas buying season. Officials claim there will be plenty to go around and the actual medal will be cast in affordable gold painted pewter instead of the more expensive gold.
“The medal will look just like the one President Obama received except this one will sing a song when you clap your hands,” claims Edgar Walton, VP of Chinese made junk.
According to Reps from the Walton family, requests for last year’s top Christmas gift, a singing Elmo-fish that hung on the wall, was such a success, WalMart wanted to have the Nobel Prize play a few pre-recorded songs as well.
The first tune was a tribute to the Nordic heritage of the actual prize….A rendition of ‘Dancing Queen’ by Abba. Unfortunetely, the rock group Abba is Swedish and the prize’s origin is Norwegian, but Walton claims since they’re all blonde on one will really care.
During the past year, President Obama received his own Nobel Peace Prize, but with some controversy attached. Many believe Obama simply received the Nobel Peace Prize as a gesture, since his first 365 days in office were really spent in long moments of disbelief and surprise over actually winning. There was little action toward successfully brokering any peace deals anywhere on Earth. The Obama award caused even greater concerns when it was given on the day after he announced further troop additions to the Afghanistan war in order to combat the Taliban.
Consumers are showing their interest as well by talking about the newest vanity-gift in various chat rooms and blogs across the internet. Arkansas resident, Henrietta White claims, “I’ll get a couple for sure! One I’ll give to the garbage man and the other to the mailman for Christmas.”
Len Mack of Spokane claims he’ll be giving a couple to the strippers down at the Boobies Club for services rendered during the past several years.
Yet another blogger took an even more amorous turn, claiming he’ll present the Nobel Prize to his girlfriend and call it, ‘The Nobel Piece Prize…For the best piece of booty in town!’
According to WalMart officials, the Nobel Peace Prize will retail for $9.99 and will have dozens of rugged stickers included for just about any deed worth honoring. All a customer has to do is peel the tape and place it on the award to personalize it.