McDonald’s Happy Meal a Day Can Prolong Life of Your Body

Denver, CO – A nutritionist, bent on taking McDonald’s down for its unhealthy practice of dishing up preservative-laden foods to the general public, has now admitted that although there are enough preservatives in a McDonald’s bun alone to allow it to sit on a shelf for a year without decomposing, she also admitted that if a person were to eat a Happy Meal a day, they would effectively be preserving their body from the inside out, thereby alleviating the necessity to having their bodies embalmed upon death.

“You may die at a much earlier age, but your body will essentially never decompose,” she said.

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