A bizarre plot has been uncovered that is sending chills down the spines of many liberals, free thinkers and political independents. A leaked memo from the highest levels of FOX News to leaders of the top ultra conservative movements reveals that a plot is underfoot to unleash millions of mentally altered FOX ‘Frankenfans’ upon all Americans who are at all left of center in the political realm.
Having for years mentally conditioned their rabid fan base to react negatively to all things liberal or leftist, FOX now plans to upload the final input into their brains in the following weeks, this being the last information needed to turn their media followers into rabid, foaming-at-the-mouth zombies. With glassed-over eyes, their brains would then only function on the mental rails set down in their minds from endless nights of indoctrination watching FOX. Their goal–tearing the alleged liberal enemy to bits.
The final coded message will be delivered on the Halloween early news, turning their dogmatic, tunnel-visioned fans into mad carriers of death, the images of local liberal and non-conservatives and their addresses burned into their brains where they can be found and devoured live. Halloween night was picked as the night of action because the zombie-like FOXtroids will be indistinguishable from the many bizarrely clad trick or treaters out that night.
The horrendous shrieks and screams of their victims will also not seem out of place on this traditional night of horror. By FOX’s estimate, this night, dubbed by them as ‘The Night Of RIGHTeous Revenge’, will result in mayhem more widespread than that of Germany’s Kristallnacht or France’s St. Bartholomews Night.
The once human monstrosities will go down the streets of America chanting the mantras that were embedded into their brains over and over again through the years: “Obama socialist!” “Cheney hero!” “Healthcare kills!” “Bush tax cuts good!” “Dismember and eat Michael Moore!”
To make the horror even more horrendous, all the Frankenfans will be wearing horrifying Rupert Murdoch masks that will scare the hell out of anyone trying to stop the mayhem.
Nice Halloween flavor, and totally appropriate pre-Election frothing. Good job!