Frank Turner “Prufrock” Parody: This Guitar Slays Left AND Right Wing Fascists

Liberty is winning
You’re a winner OR a loser
A brave intrepid pioneer
Or a parasitical abuser
The LARPing precious pedant
Of a cheap reality fan-fic
Or a grand courageous emperor
Severing 3000 Philistine dicks

Andy is a great comedy jihadist.
He’s our unintentionally hilarious jihadi chopper bad ass
He propagates his Twitter Caliphate from a dodgy pub in Ilford
Don’t know what the fuck he’s saying
But he’s the greatest lad in Romford

Moazzam is a good lad and he doesn’t have to beg
For a hearing from his boys when he spills his party keg
He gets up upon a soap-box in front of all his boys
He gets applause from Trotskyites and he’s chatting all his noise, yo!

And Andy is the resurrected spirit of Lord Haw-Haw
Sometimes jeans, sometimes keffiyeh, and he’s losing all his benefits!
And no one’s really clear about Tommy’s job description,
But the EDL are vital to this mutual shit-stirring operation.
They’ve also got some hooligans and the edgiest girls I know,
They’re hoping for an online victory with an epic Tumblr moan

But we won’t change our ways, we will proud remain
When the EDL fade away and the choppers too. And our war remains!

I am sick and tired of people
Who conduct apologetics
They’re waiting to be honored
And never ask themselves why they do this
And I know I’m they’re not the ones who are authentically indie
But I’m the actual pinko so shut your fuckin’ trap and swallow this yeah:

What I’m all about, be it high or low my station
About intolerance of hatred and contempt for superstition
And abhorrence of the rabblerousers, be it EDL or Hamas
No don’t forget to keep remembering that the only thing that’s left is liberty!

And after all the goosesteps and the choppings
For the real authentic indies
The only thing that’s left to do
Is to slay a few more fascists with this guitar!

See the great song that inspired this here:

And for one very precious line:

Here’s Woodie!

 

Author: Wallace Runnymede

Wallace is the editor of Brian K. White's epic website, Glossy News! Email him with your content at wallacerunnymede#gmail.com (Should be @, not #!) Or if you'd like me to help you tease out some ideas that you can't quite put into concrete form, I'd love to have some dialogue with you! Catch me on Patreon too, or better still, help out our great writers on the official Glossy News Patreon (see the bottom of the homepage!) Don't forget to favourite Glossy News in your browser, and like us on Facebook too! And last but VERY MUCH not the least of all... Share, share, SHARE! Thanks so much for taking the time to check out our awesome site!