So, here’s a selection of what we can offer readers and writers in 2017:

 

Substantially greater output…

 

While still maintaining good quality!

 

That’s not as hard as it sounds, although it does require substantial diligence and dedication.

We have a great circle of writers: some new, some old. Some yet to come!

Email glossynews@gmail.com & wallacerunnymede@gmail.com (both email addresses at the same time) to find out how we can fit your work in! New writers will get priority scheduling.

 

Great assistance and availability!

 

We can help you move from a vague notion to a simple sketch; from a simple sketch to a complete draft; from a complete draft to a well-polished masterpiece!

(Or as far as we can get! We will help you improve over time. You really do have nothing to lose!)

 

Ever-better use of multimedia and social media!

 

We want to see and hear your great cartoons, memes, videos, podcasts, and so much more.

We can also help you promote your work, although please bear in mind Glossy News is not primarily a promotion site. So, we have to make sure any promotional work is appropriate; including (of course!) appropriate in its timing.

This being so: promotional pieces (e.g. links to your podcast or vlog) should generally be appropriately spaced out, so as not to risk drowning out our fake news, and our various other forms of everyday content.

It goes without saying that we’re open to a wide range of opinions and styles. We don’t make arbitrary rejections; although we do draw the line at terrorists, Nazi apologists, and people who who prefer the ‘more authentic’ Peter Gabriel infancy of Genesis.

Put down that damn cotton prawn, you mainstream hatemongering idiot!

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I hope that all makes sense! 2017 is going to be an incredible year for the world’s 2nd longest-running satire site; make sure you’re part of the journey!

Wallace