Mel Gibson Writes Toilet Paper Check to Grigorieva for Child Support

Mel Gibson, recently ordered to start paying the mother of his child an additional $15,000 a month in child support, decided to take the opportunity to show Grigorieva just how much he disliked the idea and penned a check on his personal checking account, himself, for $15,000 on a roll of toilet paper.

“Yea, we all know how much toilet paper costs these days and how rare it’s becoming in California,” said Gibson. “I figured she’s gonna need all the help she can get seeing as what I pay her doesn’t seem to be be enough to wipe her own bottom.”

Grigorieva’s attorneys say the check is legal tender and in fact has already cleared Grigorieva’s checking account. They did note, however, that it wasn’t the particular brand of tissue Grigorieva prefers. “For $15,000,” they said, “it should have at least been written on a brand name toilet paper, not the one-ply garbage from one of those box stores. Next thing you know, Mel will be giving dollar toys to the kid for Christmas from one of those ‘Everything’s a Buck’ stores loaded down with Chinese lead paint.”

However, sources close to Mel says he knows exactly what he’s doing. “I have to make a check out every month for the next fu*king century. I may as well buy the economy triple roll, so it lasts longer. I’m doing the bi**h and California a big-assed favor.”

Author: P. Beckert

P. Beckert's is one voice vying for frequency room at the top of the opinion dial. Angered and bewildered by many of today’s events, P. Beckert uses humor as a tool to fight against an onslaught of stupidity and ignorance that seems to permeate the airwaves and pollute the sensitivities of a once brilliant nation. You can find more at ISaidLaughDammit.blogspot.com.

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