Orlando, Florida – Following a costly divorce, ongoing drug addiction and malicious hacker attacks to his bank accounts, Creed’s lead singer, Scott Stapp, who was once worth as much as 30 million dollars, is now flat broke and homeless.
Stapp’s money woes are so bad that he has been forced to liquidate antiques, memorabilia and treasured mementoes to avoid bankruptcy. These items include a signed copy of Britney Spears’ 1999 Rolling Stone Magazine cover, the bottle of Jack Daniels whiskey he drank from in a 2003 suicide attempt and his most prized possession, a plaque containing two breadsticks from Olive Garden’s very first batch, baked on February 4, 1982.
“It was during our summer tour in 2002 when we made a commitment to stop in as many Olive Gardens as humanly possible,” said drummer, Scott Phillips, after playing a short beat on a set of Olive Garden salad bowl drums in a recent interview with Matt Taibbi of Rolling Stone Magazine.
“The Stapper predicted that Olive Gardens would cease to exist and decided to purchase the set. He carried it around like a child, which was disturbing when we were taking pictures, but then again, the name of our band did evolve from the combination of crack and weed, so I guess it’s okay,” Phillips added.
The breadstick collection was sold for $600,000 at a recent Sotheby’s auction in New York City after Stapp paid $183,700 for the pair in 2002.
Creed, the American post-grunge and hard rock band, stopped touring in 2012, but according to multiple sources, the group has been putting together a re-working of their 1999 album, Human Clay, as a tribute to the item that once came complimentary with the purchase of any entrée or as part of the soup, salad and lunch option. The album is expected to be released in July and will include “Can You Bake Me Higher” and “With Baskets Wide Open.”
*This article was contributed by Al Harvan, who will be known in the future on GlossyNews as Shrimp Scampi.
You might want to stay out of this semi-satirical circle-jerk, Kilroy. Just saying.
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This is gonna start all over again with tomorrow’s article
Actually I was thinking of Charlie Chaplin, the man of few words who spoke volumes with his actions alone. He who dared mock the convictions of an impoverished underclass. He who put forks in rolls and danced across the table into history. Not breadsticks, rolls. Need I say more or rather shuffle on out of the scene before someone stars playing Creed?
The legendary baking mantis is im sure rolling in its grave right now listening to all of you talk ill about his breadsticks.
Where do u think they get special sauce?
You might want to stay out of this semi-satirical circle-jerk, Kilroy. Just saying.
So if I am Charlie, I must mock him.
Thank you, Pumpernickle. You remind me of a great Breadstickian, Lindsay Loafhan. To date she has donated more than $370,000 to the N.B.A., despite her recent struggles.
Lindsay bahkedfresh is a saint among breadsticks
Excuse me Max, but I am a female. But that’s what I love about you…you’re a total douche
Wichita Falls is in Texas. They hate breadsticks in Kansas. Also be careful of sending email address to Lindsay. He’ll send you unsolicited pics…and that’s not a breadstick in his pocket.
Jose that was an epic fail at an attempt to make a comment
Broken Wings was a Mister, Mister song, mister.
Come on this makes none sence of humor!!! On less phillips, and tremoti plans to buy the wing stop badge as dedication of the broken wings song!!!
You know I once had to make a choice between buying a Nickelback or a Creed album. You know what I did? I took the twenty dollars and went to the nearest Olive Garden to get the unlimited soup and salad lunch option that came with complimentary breadsticks. [Crying] That is the only victim here.
Nathan I think the real problem is you juat havent had those warm buttery garilc breadsticks.
This has to be the worse article ever written on the net. It attempts to ruin a guy who has been robed and stolen from and is now missing. He has been missing for over 3 weeks now and no one seems to care.
At Olive Gardens, we’re all family. Now go to your room!
The ghost of the Olive Garden remembers you asking for more breadsticks when your basket wasn’t empty, Bill. Don’t underestimate the power
Breadsticks aside, this article just proves what we always knew a decade ago. Even Jesus hates Creed.
But the Devil hates Olive Gardens ever since he got kicked out for offering Eve a breadstick.
Hey guys, you ever hear about a little far-out scandal called the Olive Garden scandal? There hasn’t been any talk of it for, like, literally 5 and a quarter years, dude. I’d totally love that shit if you gave me a brief update, cause there’s not much talk about it in the past few decades or so.
BTway: Don’t diss Fox, MSNBC ain’t Rocks!
(…-Ing it, well you get the picture, man).
By the way, you amateurs should work for a proper media outlet, I mean literally a proper one.
Idiots.
You’re just lucky the N.B.A.’s founder Pita Sourdough isn’t here to see this. May he rest in peace. He would bake you like raisin bread in the Tuscan sun.
To the other two commenters. How dare you say that scott stapps love of breadsticks is a mental illness? I also love breadsticks, does that make me mentally ill?
Damn! As a collector of fine breadstick works I wish i had been at that auction. I am sad mr. Stapp had to give up his beloved piece but sometimes thats just how the breadstick crumbles.
Mental illness? This man had to give up his most beloved item. Have you two even eaten a breadstick before?
What a horrible situation to make fun of. Mental illness, suicide and divorce? You people think that’s funny? What a disgusting article. Something’s you just don’t make fun of.
This article is a complete embarrassment. Completely low class making fun
Of mental illness. Some things you just don’t poke fun at. Poorly written and this is how nasty
Rumors get started.