Archive | Comics

Relationship Bound to End in Failure (Comic)

Relationship Bound to End in Failure (Comic)

Ever feel like you’re in a relationship for all the wrong reasons, or in the right relationship for all the right reasons, but with the wrong person? This web comic knows exactly how you feel.

Click on the comic to enlarge it and see it full size

To see all of my comics, including the many that have yet to be published, go to GlossyNews.com/c. It also includes details and commentary you won’t find anywhere else.

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Posted in Comics, Human Interest0 Comments

Alcoholism and Mommy Issues Meet in the Crosshairs (comic)

Alcoholism and Mommy Issues Meet in the Crosshairs (comic)

If you’ve ever had the opportunity to tele-commute, you surely know the joys of being drunk at work. Today, our resident cartoonist Brian K. White takes it to a new level by adding it to a whole ridiculous layer of parental forsakenness.

My mom loves grand-daughters. Loves them to bits. Takes them to Disney Land, keeps them overnight, you name it. Even the 2yr-old daughter of a girl I once dated was taken to California… but my sons? No such luck.

Click on the image to see it full-size.

To see all of my comics, including the many that have yet to be published, go to GlossyNews.com/c. It also includes details and commentary you won’t find anywhere else.

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Posted in Comics, Strange People0 Comments

I Met a Hotty on Reddit (comic)

I Met a Hotty on Reddit (comic)

Oh man, this “girl” I met is just so awesome. We have the same interests and everything. I tell her what I like, then about 5-hours later she writes back with remarkably specific things about my interest. Like as if she’d just Googled it and fed me back a bunch of random lines.

But this is Reddit, and liars are simply not permitted. I can’t say definitively that we’re going to be together forever, but I have a pretty strong suspicion. Continue Reading

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Posted in Comics, Internets Tubes1 Comment

Jesus Forgives (almost) Everything (comic)

Jesus Forgives (almost) Everything (comic)

Did you know your sins can be absolved? Did you know your conviction can be overturned in the afterlife? Even if you’ve been sentenced to 15-consecutive life sentences, once you die, you’re absolved and free. That’s the power of Jesus.

You don’t have to live virtuously, just accept Him as your lord and savior. You can continue shooting smack, smacking your woman, and womanizing your neighborhood children… just so long as you love your Christ, accept him as the one true son of God, and maybe throw a few bucks at the church. Continue Reading

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Posted in Comics, Religionism0 Comments

How Much Really Is That Doggy in the Window? (comic)

How Much Really Is That Doggy in the Window? (comic)

We’ve all heard the jingle, but really how much indeed is that doggy in the window?

This age-old question deserves an answer, even if the asker is clearly suffering from some sort of chemical or mental impairment. Seriously, how much money do you want for that doggy in the window?

I’m sure there’s a right answer in here somewhere, but I doubt either of those in this comic have that right answer. Continue Reading

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Posted in Comics, Society0 Comments

Toddler Tells Parent to “Shut Up” (comic)

Toddler Tells Parent to “Shut Up” (comic)

If you ever have the misfortune of sprouting offspring, you’ll know what I mean when I say they can get pretty lippy, and mighty quickly at that. Pretty much as soon as they learn to talk, they know how to talk back.

You can punch them in the mouth, but if you do, send me your address, because I might like a few forceful words with you for having done that… they’re kids, you can’t get mad for their behavior. You mold them into who they are. If they swear, it’s because you taught them to swear. If they tell you to shut up, well, I’ll get to that. Continue Reading

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Posted in Comics1 Comment

Don’t Let Jesus’ Death Be for Nothing (comic)

Don’t Let Jesus’ Death Be for Nothing (comic)

We learn from a very young age that Jesus died for our sins, so we can commit them without having to sacrifice animals to our Lord God to earn repentance. Still leaves a few questions, but my question is better.

If we don’t sin, why in the hell would Jesus’ death be worth it? I mean, this is the literal son of God. He died so we can sin without regret. If I don’t sin, I feel like I’ll go to hell just for that. Continue Reading

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Posted in Comics, Religionism0 Comments

Hot Ex Wants to Hook Up w/ Me (comic)

Hot Ex Wants to Hook Up w/ Me (comic)

So you ever had that ex… you know the one. The one you never forgot. The one that always haunts your dreams. I guess you could call her “the one that got away,” even if it was you that forced her away.

So imagine you have that ex, and she’s approximately as hot as the sun, and roughly as kind as Ghandi. And then imagine she might like to have sex with you without the strings of relationship attached. If she can agree to that, you might have the most amazing weekends away you’ve ever imagined, but if not, well, she’s still mighty awesome.

What was I talking about again? Sorry, got lost in a fantasy.

I give up, just scroll down and see the comic Full size below.

87-hotgirl-come-on

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Posted in Comics1 Comment

What Penguins Look Like on Casual Friday (comic)

What Penguins Look Like on Casual Friday (comic)

I Googled this before I drew it, and sure enough, there wasn’t a whole hell of a lot out there showing what penguins might look like out of their tuxedos. Turns out, at least according to my comic, that it’s because they don’t look terribly good that way. Continue Reading

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Posted in Comics, Environment0 Comments

Even Atheists May Hear the Voice of Jesus (comic)

Even Atheists May Hear the Voice of Jesus (comic)

We are all able to hear the voice of God. Even atheists may hear His voice, though it may not carry the exact message that the faithful would like to hear.

SCROLL DOWN TO SEE THE CARTOON.

Think you know the Bible? Take the GlossyNews Unbeatable Bible Quiz!

So surely no true Scotsman would behave like this, but what about the guy that hears the voice of Jesus, God, or the immutable Holy Spirit? For reasons unknown to me, we don’t call those who follow the words of their gods “crazy people” despite the fact that they hear voices in their head. Continue Reading

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Posted in Comics, Religionism1 Comment

You Know What’s Great About Being a Hipster? (comic)

You Know What’s Great About Being a Hipster? (comic)

We all hate hipsters, it’s universal. Even hipsters themselves hate the term as much as they despise being one, which is odd, since it isn’t yet “cool” to be a hipster, so you’d think they’d love it.

(SCROLL DOWN TO SEE THE CARTOON FULL SIZE)

It’s all pre-cool, meta-cool and any other filler terms I can think of to put here to make this seem like an actual entry, and not just a graphical post. Continue Reading

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Posted in Comics, Society1 Comment

Gays Arguably Wrong, Polygamy/Sex Slavery Right (comic)

Gays Arguably Wrong, Polygamy/Sex Slavery Right (comic)

If we’re going to attempt to pass legislation based on the Old Testament, why stop at homosexuality. There’s a lot of really interesting stuff in the Old Testament, let’s cling to some of those too.

Sure, the rail against homosexuality continued in the New Testament, but it was only through Paul in Corinthians. That’s one apostle out of twelve. Jesus said nothing on the subject, ten other apostles were likewise silent, and Judas… well, we’re not really supposed to know what he said. Continue Reading

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Posted in Comics, Religionism3 Comments

Occupy Movement has returned in full force (comic)

Occupy Movement has returned in full force (comic)

If you ever wondered what happened to the Occupy movement, you’re not alone. It was once large and flourishing, but the police put a stop to that, and now it’s basically dead… but maybe it’s back, thanks to this recent development.

It’s true that the sentiments still remain, and that the wealth gap in America continues to widen, so why is it that Occupy has fallen by the wayside. Surely it has nothing to do with the fact that the police arrested so many people, hosed down the rest and tear-gassed the remainder. No, that’s surely secondary. Continue Reading

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Posted in Biz News, Comics1 Comment

How to Scam Your Local Missionaries (comic)

How to Scam Your Local Missionaries (comic)

I get way too many missionaries at my door. It’s about every 10-14 days. Maybe it’s because I live in a largely immigrant area and they think we must all be suckers for something new.

But there’s a loophole. They swear to give out free money to those in need… they promise you don’t have to tithe unless you can afford it… and (unlike the Mormons) they don’t ask to see proof of your financial situation. Continue Reading

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Posted in Comics, Religionism1 Comment

Ever Feel Like There’s a Transcript of Your Life? (comic)

Ever Feel Like There’s a Transcript of Your Life? (comic)

We’ve all been there. Wondering who’s listening, how long our words will remain. Well this lady gets a tad literal with it. You have to see the comic to appreciate it, and well you should.

CLICK ON THE IMAGE to see it full size.

To see all of my comics, including the many that have yet to be published, go to GlossyNews.com/c. It also includes details and commentary you won’t find anywhere else.

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Posted in Comics, Strange People1 Comment

Why did the hipster cross the road – Part Two (comic)

Why did the hipster cross the road – Part Two (comic)

In part two of this question, we dig deeper. It’s a question nearly as old as the one about the chicken. Why did the hipster cross the road?

Surely it wasn’t to get a better deal on a pair of pre-worn, faded slacks. Surely it wasn’t because there was a coffee shop on the other side of the road that was less trendy than the one he was already at. So what was the reason? Continue Reading

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Posted in Comics0 Comments

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