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SJWs Outraged as Taiwanese Culturally Appropriate Pro-Cat Activism

SJWs Outraged as Taiwanese Culturally Appropriate Pro-Cat Activism

Recently, Taiwan banned the slaughter of cats and dogs for food.

Far from being thrilled at this measure, SJWs have created a crushing list of grievances on Social Justice Tumblr.

1. Stop Appropriating Our Struggles

Uh, WTF, dude? People in the US like cats and dogs. We have personally been advocating for the rights of the feline community for decades. Who the hell gives these Taiwanese people the right to appropriate our struggles? That is literally exactly like some a straight white guy quoting MLK. Who the hell do these ignorant right-wing bigots think they are?!

2. Indian Culture Doesn’t Belong to You

Everyone in India is a Hindu. OMG! I just love Hindu philosophy, it’s so peaceful; not like that violent, brutal, Abrahamic… er, Christian and Jewish brutality!

But I have literally no idea why these idiots think they somehow get to appropriate vegetarianism, an absolute inviolable cornerstone of Indian culture.

Who are you to say what is essential to one culture, and what is not?

Who are you to loot and pillage the ancient spiritual treasures of the land of the gods, just because it seems twee and cute and sexy?

3. National borders are Arbitrary Social Constructs

Taiwan have been fighting for ‘freedom’ and ‘national sovereignty’ for decades. I am literally soooooooo tired of people whining about national sovereignty. Why don’t these idiots realize that national borders are just arbitrary social constructs that just… man, they are just so frickin’ divisive, dude!

4. Oops

Oh wait, hang on…

Aren’t Taiwanese people actually Asian?

Sorry dude, my bad.

Guess everyone makes mistakes. I wouldn’t worry about it too much if I were you.

5. WTF

OMG I just found out that Taiwan is a capitalist country! How the hell can you be from a, like, totally spiritually groovy country and support capitalist oppression and exploitation? That literally makes no fuckin’ sense, dude!




Professor Guru Angus Lenn(on/in)vedanta Smiggles from the Social Constructionist String Theory Department of Bushmills Metaphysical College aptly notes:

It really is rather curious to see how such self-appointed ‘Social Justice Warriors’ wildly swing from idealisation to demonisation.

Perhaps it is worth considering taking a purely empirical and evidence-based approach, instead of working purely on the operative basis of ‘the feelz.’


Image attribution:

By User:SKopp[1], Public Domain, Link


This post was written by

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Sub-editor of Glossy News. Contact me to pitch or submit your satire! You can buy my satire and poetry ebooks from many online stores, including Amazon. Make sure you like the Glossy News and Wallace Runnymede pages on Facebook!


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