Anti-Tax Crusaders Shocked IRS Would Question Them

Tea Party political activity groups, known for their hardline anti-tax position, were singled out by the IRS for scrutiny.

“It’s crazy,” says anti-tax crusader and Wisconsin Tea Party head Colin Felcher. I can’t imagine a single reason why they’d think we’re against paying taxes.

Unofficial IRS spokesman Davis Kaeng, who works by day as an official IRS spokesman, agreed to speak with us on the condition of anonymity, but also that we use his real name and record the conversation.

GLOSSYNEWS.COM: Alright Mr. Kaeng, if that is your real name.

Davis Kaeng-IRS: It is.

GLOSSYNEWS.COM: Mr. Kaeng, why did you single out only the groups whose stated mission it was to avoid taxes at all costs?

Davis Kaeng-IRS: Are you serious? That’s a serious question?

GLOSSYNEWS.COM: Yes.

Davis Kaeng-IRS: Well they’re already in something of a gray area, since they’re basically acting as corporations in virtually every regard. That, and the fact that their one stated mission is to not pay tax, even though we all have an obligation to do exactly that.

GLOSSYNEWS.COM: So no reason, is what you’re saying?

Davis Kaeng-IRS: No. I’m saying the reason is that they function like corporations and have a stated anti-tax mission.

GLOSSYNEWS.COM: So… no reason. I’ll mark that down.

Davis Kaeng-IRS: Surely you can see why we’d want to take a look at anti-tax crusaders from a tax perspective. We didn’t find any of them guilty, we just looked into their practices and determined it was all legit.

GLOSSYNEWS.COM: So you hate America, is what you’re saying?

Davis Kaeng-IRS: We just made sure they were on the up-and-up, nobody was accused of anything. Nobody has been harmed. We just exercised due dilligence.

GLOSSYNEWS.COM: So you’d like to rape the founding fathers?

Davis Kaeng-IRS: Can I get a different guy to do the interview, I feel like I’m taking crazy pills here.

Marckus Haeder, founding member of the Tea Party Ameri-Patriotichrists told Glossy News, “this is the worst day in the history of the world and nothing will ever again compare to the horrors and atrocities committed by the IRS.”

When asked if he understood hyperbole, Haeder responded, “this is totally different than what’s going on in Greece, but we feel for our oppressed brothers in the political and business worlds over there.”

Much, much less on this story as it continues to not develop.