FORT LAUDERDALE–Tumult ensued following initial reports that the crash of a Mitt Romney blimp was instead determined to be the explosion of Karl Rove’s much talked about brain.
The head of the conservative political analyst and FOX NEWS favorite spontaneously blew to smithereens after he attempted to opine past the GOP presidential candidate’s obvious lack of readiness on foreign policy.
Emergency crews described the scene as chaotic. “People were scrambling everywhere,” recalled a paramedic. “One guy who looked like Sean Hannity, held a Styrofoam coffee cup, screaming “Scoop up his brain, scoop it up, hurry!”
“And the smell,” he continued, shaking his head. “Horrific. Like hate, if hate had a smell, sort of like rotting, stinking garbage. Like what the River Styx must smell like. It reeked.”
Rove had often been described as the brain behind the presidency of his former boss, George W. Bush.
Onlookers reported a slender whiff of smoke emanated from the top of Rove’s dome after he acknowledged on-air that President Obama had won the post-debate polls after the third and final presidential debate.
“Tumultuous,” said Romney when asked about Rove, offering a word he used five times during the debate, bayoneted about with another oft-used word, the 12-times-a-charm sixties standard, “peace”. Squirting sanitizer between his hands, he set off to press the flesh of a crowd of mere middle class underlings. “Simply tumultuous,” Romney repeated, flashing a peace sign.
No autopsy is planned. Not much left to autopsy.