Tag Archive | "undecided voters"

Romney to Sway Female Voters by Showing Compassion, Penis


Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney today unveiled his new plan to persuade female voters to back his bid for the White House by showing them two things that have thus far remained firmly hidden: his compassionate, caring side and his vintage 1947 sexual organ.

He is hoping this strategy will win over voters who have so far been put off by policies that have been deemed as cold and uncaring, as well as those that will “get their kicks” from seeing photographic evidence of Romney’s “schlong”. Read the full story

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Meet Howard & Marjorie Grunfeldt of Pickerington, Ohio – America’s Last Remaining Undecided Voters


With each passing week, the 2012 presidential race is getting tighter and tighter.

The most recent Gallup poll has it at 49.99999999% for Romney and 49.99999999% for Obama. A dead heat.

Scientists have discovered molecules with more space between them than these polling numbers.

Just three months ago, the number of battleground states had narrowed to eight. In the past month, it has narrowed even further – to just one state: Ohio. Both candidates have been spending so much time in this state they now know most Ohioans on a first-name basis, as well as their pets. Read the full story

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