Prayer Warriors Return From Battle With Hugo Chavez

A group of faithful prayer warriors, armed with nothing more than their bibles and a long history of religious indoctrination, are slowly returning to their normal lives after what they describe as their victory over evil.

They find vindication for their methods in the death of Venezuela’s President Hugo Chavez in a battle that spanned 14 years and his four successful elections.

Right: Hugo Chavez – alleged victim of religious extremists

Think you know the Bible? Take the GlossyNews Unbeatable Bible Quiz!

Now they return after their long battle, a battle which they began in February 1999. Spreading word when they could about the evils that were occurring in that once tranquil south american country. Evil that went so far as to take the property of foreigners and return it to their own people.

It wasn’t an easy battle, they put in long hours on their knees without the usual benefit of a ten dollar bill here or there. Their determination in the task at hand unswayed by either time or ridicule. Faith was at their backs and no one could snatch victory from them.

But their rest will be short, they will again pull their tired masses together and start anew. Praying for their lord, the one who they believe started them on this journey, to help them put an end to such things as salacious JC Penny advertising, to erase the very thought of equality for all from the minds of the majority, to prevent their daughters from becoming common street workers at the very sight of a birth control pill.

No, some would find they do not possess the will to fight on like these faithful warriors. Never crumbling in defeat as they are laughed off the corner of a public street. Fortified by nothing but a small flask and a handful of soon to expire valiums, they continue on with their delirious battles.

Author: Mike Kelly

I like finding the humor in politics. Sometimes what you hear isn't that far from the bizarre.