The UK’s Big Brother think tanks at Chatham House and the Tavistock Institute have now – in their superior wisdom – ordained nursery-age children should be monitored for signs of Pavlovian brainwashing by Islamist extremists – according to a leaked police memo left in a trashcan at Hyde Park’s Whistleblower’s Corner – with copies being passed on to the Daily Snitch and the Grassers Gazette. Read the full story

The latest Kafkaesque directive to be launched by the Brussels-based E-USSR is a super-intrusive questionnaire to be completed by the parents of 5-year old children who are ready to start school.

The dystopic European Bully Boy state’s interrogation sheet contains no less than an 83-point survey of autocratic snooping – failure to complete which might well see your kids snatched under the State’s totalitarian ‘Protective Child Care and Custody’ programme – and your sad Read the full story

To comply with fresh slapstick Big Brother legislation being issued by the E-USSR’s bored bureaucrats in bonkers Brussels, family homes across Britain could be invaded by HSE inspectors checking that parents are keeping their children safe.

Whitehall’s Ministry for Wasting Time & Money is recommending that inspectors make sure parents have fitted smoke alarms, stair gates, locks on medicine cupboards, windows and ovens, and temperature controls to stop bath water getting too hot – or cold – with emergency flotation rings fitted Read the full story

The opening words of the age-old children’s nursery rhyme ”What shall we do with the drunken sailor?” have been removed from the lyrics in yet another of the Labour government’s stupid EU-compliance nanny state “Let’s re-write history” projects.

The Bonkers Publishing charity says the re-wording of the rhyme from “drunken sailor” to “depressed pirate” simply confuses matters even more, serving to smear and libel sailors by classing them all as rape and pillage buccaneering types instead of a bunch of seafaring alkies. Read the full story

The latest piece of asinine legislature to emerge from the EU’s Ministry for Wasting Time and Money in Brussels involves HSE risk assessments for every possible human function and endeavour – from brewing a cup of tea or coffee to opening a can of soup – to cleaning your teeth and gargling – to wiping one’s arse and – to – believe it or not – a risk assessment ‘danger rating’ index for eating biscuits. Read the full story