Most users of the Windows operating system are familiar with such frequently used keyboard shortcuts as Ctrl+C for copying selected text or Ctrl+V for inserting text. A number of new keyboard shortcuts have recently been introduced to assist users in handling common new word processing and electronic communications tasks. Among them are the following:
| Insert+H+C | Automatically posts comment “How cute!” when Facebook friends post pictures of their children |
| Ctrl+U+F | Politely un-friends someone on Facebook |
| Ctrl+F+U | Impolitely un-friends someone on Facebook |
| Alt+Home | Switches bank account’s automatic house mortgage payments to pup tent layaway order payments |
| Shift+N+B+A | Replaces “Heat” with “Mavericks” |
| Shift+N+H+L | Replaces “Canucks” with “Bruins” |
| Ctl+F6 | Writes script for next “The Fast and the Furious” sequel |
| Alt+P+R | Alters Wikipedia entry on Paul Revere to validate latest public statements |
| Alt+N | Replaces “nigger”, “coon”, “darkie”, “spade”, “colored”, “bumper lips”, “burr head”, “jackamammy”, “jigaboo”, “jungle bunny”, “lawn jockey”, “pickaninny” and “porch-monkey” in historical fiction for young people with “antique farm equipment” |
| Ctrl+A+W | Adds “Do you really want to attach this photo of your penis?” prompt to Outlook e-mail settings |
| Shift+M+R | Replaces “My health care plan for Massachusetts could be a model for the nation” with “My health care plan for Massachusetts could be a model for the nation, but not in a national way, of course, because that would clearly be a disaster” |
| Shift+T+P | Replaces “Obamneycare” with “Uh…I was just quoting what President Obama said.” |
| Shift+N+E+W+T | Replaces “right-wing social engineering” with “securing Medicare’s future” |
| Shift+P+B | Replaces “Palin” with “Bachmann” |
| Shift+O | Replaces “Wall Street fat cats” with “my valued 2012 campaign contributors” |
| Shift+E+S | Replaces “disgraced former governor” with “CNN host” in updated CV |
| Shift+End | Replaces 05.21.2011 with 10.21.2011 as Rapture date |
| Shift+UpArrow | Replaces Osama bin Laden with Ayman al-Zawahiri in Al Qaeda e-mail signature |
| Delete+DownArrow | Creates automatic response for bin Laden Gmail account: “I am currently out of my office with limited e-mail access.” |