Tag Archive | "financial crisis"

Exclusive interview with Chase CEO Jaime Dimon


EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW WITH JP MORGAN CHASE CEO JAIME DIMON by Derisive Duck senior business editor.

Derisive Duck: “Mr. Dimon, may I call you Jaime?”

Dimon: “No.”

DD: “Please explain to our readers, Mr. Dimon, how your bank could lose more than four billion dollars, almost overnight?” Read the full story

Share

Posted in Biz NewsComments (1)

The Tea Party’s bold plans to eliminate the debt completely by December 17th


Earlier this month, after a long and contentious fight between Democrats and Tea Party Republicans, our federal government narrowly avoided its first-ever credit default. People all over the world waited anxiously to find out whether our elected officials were going to voluntarily inflict economic suicide on the nation. In the final nail-biting hours, they reached a compromise to avert disaster – much to the bitter disappointment of every Tea Party member in America. Read the full story

Share

Posted in PoliticsComments (0)

Global Debt Crisis Eases Worries About Global Warming


NEW YORK – Despite suffering through one of the hottest summers on record, Americans are finding that their previous concerns about the possible long-term effects of global warming have been nearly eradicated as a result of their newfound fears about the global debt crisis. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Environment, PoliticsComments (2)

Caddy Breaks Silence on Obama-Boehner Debt Ceiling Golf Match


Breaking now to The Daily Trough: a caddy in the important Obama-Boehner June golf meeting at Andrews AFB has come forward with information on the current impasse between both leaders.

This caddy strongly resembles Paul Krugman but said this appearance is entirely coincidental. “No,” he said. “My name is Joe. Joe Steigwitz.” Read the full story

Share

Posted in PoliticsComments (0)

Irish in Feverish Leprechaun Hunt to Rescue Economy


DUBLIN, Ireland – In the wake of some of the worst economic news to hit Ireland for decades, record numbers of Irish people are laying traps hoping to catch the elusive leprechauns and make them hand over the gold in their possession.

Some claim that the stores of gold held captive by the country’s leprechauns is enough to not only bring Ireland out of the financial mess but to make it the richest country in the world. Read the full story

Share

Posted in World NewsComments (14)

Banks Face Fines for Murdering Delinquent Homeowners


DOVER, Delaware (GlossyNews) – Justice Department investigators confirmed today they are considering possible fines and other penalties against several of the United States’ largest financial institutions for the murders of hundreds of homeowners delinquent in their mortgage payments.

The Justice Department responded to complaints from families of recent murder victims claiming to receive billing statements from the deceased’s mortgage companies demanding payment for “ammunition services,” “break-in and terrorizing administrative charges,” and “blood removal and dry cleaning fees,” among other charges related to “Mortgage Remediation Services.” Read the full story

Share

Posted in Biz News, CrimeComments (4)

Recession Forces Upper Class to Flirt with Mediocrity


NEW YORK, NY (GlossyNews) — The recent economic downturn has delivered ubiquitous plight across America, but no other group has been as dramatically affected as the upper class. This was readily apparent by watching patrons exit one of New York’s top wine bars on Tuesday. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Top StoriesComments (1)

Glossy News Exclusive Exposés


-- (SEE ALL GlossyNews.com Videos) --



Glossy News Fake Commercials!





Glossy News Podcast


(Listen on iTunes or Libsyn)


More Great Satire:

Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?



Our Top Authors (last 30-days)



All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial