Categorized | Religionism

Party Animal Gaddafi Goes Bonkers

Party Animal Gaddafi Goes Bonkers

Two hundred gold-digging Italian slappers bit off more than they could chew last Sunday night after answering a recruitment ad’ to attend a posh wine and dine shagfest do in the salubrious and elegant suburbs of exotic Rome.

However canapés and cocktails were definitely not on the strict Muslim menu and the legion of sun-tanned buxom young beauties found themselves being sermonised to convert to Islam, with a greater percentage going into knicker-pissing shit scared mode when they thought they were going to end up getting white-slaved into some Arabian harem as three-hole suck and swallow sluts for the rest of their natural born days.

Those replying to the newspaper ad’ claim the selection process had been stringent and the identity of their hosts remained – initially – a total mystery.

The girls had to be stunners – between 18 and 35 – a minimum of 5:7 tall and observe a strict dress code – no plunging cleavage-revealing dresses, fishnet stockings, mini-skirts, peephole bras or crotchless panties.

The two-hundred women who passed muster were then chauffeured out to a plush residential corner of the Italian capital where they went through a rigorous security shake-down before being shown into an elegant reception room without even a flute of Sunny D’ orange drink with a splash of paint thinners to whet their whistles.

After an hour of whispered speculations and pointless innuendo the host with the most was finally revealed – Colonel Muammar Maddafi – the Messiah of Africa himself – in person – who was in town to attend the UN’s Spaghetti summit.

Thoughts of ‘oh-ho’ crossed the minds of one and more of the canny lasses among the split-arsed group – we’re gonna get propositioned for an all-out cluster fuck orgy with the numpty Colonel and his Arab Bedouin mates.

But no, such a debauched evening’s entertainment was not on the menu either.

Maddafi hopped up behind a small podium and commenced lecturing the gang of two hundred – in Arabic – on the joys and delights of converting to Islam and being some manky Arab’s bed warmer, bottle washer and general all-round chattel for the rest of their lives.

He preached about the wonders and benefits of Islam, assuring his guests that it wasn’t really a misogynistic religion – well not too much of one – as long as they behaved and didn’t commit adultery – and encouraging them to convert.

Two hours later the girls were shipped back to town – looking a touch bemused, a mere 50 euros better off for their trouble – and clutching a freebie copy of the ‘Good News’ Koran – in Pashtu – plus a complimentary dose of earache from the numpty Colonel’s pontificating.

However, perhaps the next time the psychotic Colonel gets it into his head to recruit some Caucasian pussy to share his tent among the sands of old Araby he might log onto the net and Google up one of the myriad European dating agencies – such as Eros or Sapphic Delights if he wants to get really kinky and hit pay dirt.

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- who has written 211 posts on GlossyNews.com.

Rusty's Skewed News Views are spoof publications, fired by the ironies of human nature and tempered with elements of satire and parody, and should not, therefore, be taken too seriously. These are inspired by traveling around the Earth more times than Skylab and composed while observing the inherent idiocies of Mankind. Thus lawyers be duly advised : All libel writs issued on behalf of offended humourless ego's and / or those blighted by unqualified arrogance herein lampooned may be addressed to : Rusty the Boddington's Badger, Igloo 27, Pasquinade Gardens, Penguin Parade, Ross Ice Shelf, Antarctica - or via TheSatireStall.Blogspot.com

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