Tag Archive | "Christians"

A Psalm for the Tea Party


1) The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want–to talk to liberals.

2) He maketh me lie down in untaxed green pastures: he leadeth me to the clear waters of pro-Gun states where I can shoot deer or thieves as God intended; no libs shall take my guns away.

3) He restoreth our souls to their Constitutional originals; he leadeth us down the righteous right-wing path where no left-leaning wingnuts lie in wait. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Politics, ReligionismComments (0)

An Open Letter to Al Queda and its Branch Affiliates


Good day, guys. How is it going? Blow up anything fun today? Shoot your quota of infidels yet? OK, sorry you’re having a bad day.

Just a few questions I wanted to ask you guys. (I am assuming you are all guys. I doubt you’ve opened a female branch.)

Think you know the Bible? Take the GlossyNews Unbeatable Bible Quiz!

Read the full story

Share

Posted in Religionism, War ZoneComments (2)

East Texas Town Succumbs to Old-Fashioned Steapl Chase


Raisin, TX-The East Texas town of Raisin has found itself in a predictable predicament culminating from the holier-than-thou atmosphere that often pervades small towns across the United States.

When you approach Raisin, a town of 2500 that sits in a dale along a two-lane highway, a gigantic weathered sign depicts an intimate close-up of a strikingly Aryan Jesus on what is arguably one of his worst days. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Human Interest, ReligionismComments (0)

The Pope Faces A Day In Court


VATICAN CITY (GlossyNews) — A leading Atheist Richard Dawkins has hinted on the possibility of suing the Pope on child abuse cover ups in the Catholic church when he was Cardinal. This revelation has not led to a proper response yet. So, while the Vatican has, thus far, ignored Dawkins and says it’s a virtual impossibility, Catholics all over the world have voiced their contempt. Read the full story

Share

Posted in ReligionismComments (2)

An Audacious Attempt at Haitian Relief Efforts


The headlines read: “Americans Held Taking Children from Haiti.” It then goes on to report that a group of 10 Baptists mostly from Idaho, but also from Texas and Kansas formed the “Haitian Orphan Rescue Mission” in order to go into Haiti, “scoop up 100 orphans” out of the wreckage of Haiti and ultimately transport them to an orphanage they were “planning” to build in the Dominican Republic. The 33 children they were in “possession” of ranged in age from 2 months to 12 years old. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Serious CommentaryComments (0)

Mark of the Beast “666” Encoded on Holiday Gift Cards


A record number of Christians have been flooding their local Wal-Mart stores and asking for replacements for the gift cards they received for Christmas due to the fact that they claim the mark of the beast “666” has been encoded within the card.

Although the card numbers themselves do not contain the number 666, customers have complained that when they go to Wal-Mart intending to use the cards to purchase items, their purchases almost always total out to either $6.66, $66.66 or for larger purchases $666 and change. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Religionism, SocietyComments (0)

Glossy News Exclusive Exposés


-- (SEE ALL GlossyNews.com Videos) --



Glossy News Fake Commercials!





Glossy News Podcast


(Listen on iTunes or Libsyn)


More Great Satire:

Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?



Our Top Authors (last 30-days)



All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial