Ann Coulter Grants Trump Permission to Reopen Federal Government… Finally.

Washington, DC- Political pundit, and current Trump Administration Minister of All Things Policy, Ann Coulter, granted President Donald Trump permission to end the federal government shutdown on Thursday, claiming she was bored with the lack of progress achieved after another fruitless round of negotiations failed to reach a bipartisan deal on Wednesday.

“Fuck it, I’m bored with this,” she wrote on her Shitter feed Thursday morning. “Bipartisan negotiations have failed. The Wall is dead. @TheRealDonaldTrump, I think you made my point. Please pass the CR NOW and reopen the government.” #FartOfTheDeal #WhoIn2020?

Many on the right were taken by surprise with Coulter’s Sheets, and voiced their displeasure with her shutdown reversal, which has entered it’s 27th day and is the longest in American history.

Read more Ann Coulter Grants Trump Permission to Reopen Federal Government… Finally.

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Trump Comes Up With His Own Version Of The Pledge Of Allegiance

Commandant Trump, expanding his power over we serf’s everyday life in keeping with his expanding ego, has taken it upon himself to rewrite the Pledge of Allegiance, a cornerstone of American heritage. His version, ghost written by Kellyanne Conway with content and spell-checking by Ann Coulter, differs greatly from the Pledge of Allegiance we all grew up with. Trump states that it “better reflects our current times and realities” (content and spell-checking also by Ann Coulter). Read more Trump Comes Up With His Own Version Of The Pledge Of Allegiance

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