Don’t underestimate notable ‘quiet man’ Iain Duncan Smith.
I mean, he was critical of Blair’s achingly well-meaning intervention in Afghanistan, so the Tories are obviously nicer than New Labour!
The proof is in the pudding, after all. By their fruits you shall know them…
But enough of the trite cliches. I daresay this is not so much about flamboyant rhetoric.
As a compassionate conservative, I simply cannot just sit there, and see the dysgenic community in such evident distress.
And as I have so often heard from our sickly, effete, well-meaning but ineffective and sentimentally bleeding-heart leftie opponents and enemies: ‘The first principle: Do no harm.’
Now, it is self-evident to all normal, standard-issue, medically and economically valuable, non-disabled people, that anyone afflicted with a dysgenic handicap will inevitably suffer for every moment of their lives.
For after all, this has nothing whatsoever to do with ‘society,’ or so-called ‘economic inequality’ (contradiction in terms!), or ‘prejudice,’ or any of that other tedious and speculative lefty nonsense. No! It is purely because of their genetic destiny.
‘There is no alternative.’
And it is for this reason that I have decided to ‘do no harm.’
For I cannot, in all conscience, permit the perpetuation of such miserable, woeful, tear-bestrewn lives as those of the dysgenic community.
No, no, NO! ‘Do no harm.’ I shall certainly do no harm.
Yes, I simply cannot permit myself to sit there and see the misery of these poor, dear, beleaguered, suffering Untermenschen. So, the kindest thing to do is to just put an end to their suffering, once and for all!
…
Well, as always…
I think you all know what I am talking about.
Notable public figure David Cameron has conclusively and charismatically refuted the leaked tape recording transcribed above.
Now, now, calm down, dear! IDS has informed your Prime Minister that he ‘doesn’t recognise the allegations,’ which is always a rather convincing way to confound one’s critics, what what?
And for my part, one possesses absolutely no conception whatsoever whence this sinister transcript may have proceeded. Perchance Corbyn and Corbyn’s Corbynites have dared venture to maliciously concoct a transparently falsified recording, merely in order to besmirch the good and honourable name of one’s own dearest old partybums?
Well, my national enemy has just made a fatal misstep. I just shan’t think he shall ever recover from this one!