I’ve been gracious about this for years, but at some point even the most jaded of satirist has to throw up his hands and say there simply has to be some grand conspiracy at work. Perhaps there isn’t. Perhaps it’s pure coincidence that the same guy who published stories about what a worthless bucket of brackish humanity Paris Hilton is would then find himself on the outs with Hilton Hotels for years to come.
I was working for Puerto Rico Lifestyle Magazine when this whole crazy saga kicked off. I requested site visitation privileges, a rubber-stamp sort of deal, and despite giving them months to prepare, counting on them, and then giving them months more to prepare again, they wouldn’t even let me in to see a property. I wasn’t asking for cash or even a free room (though they offered it to all travel writers,) but just to give me a contact to see each property couldn’t happen.
Come on, a guy flies 4,000 miles and you won’t even let him view the property? That’s weak at best, and maybe it was mere incompetence, rather than something more nefarious, right? But Hilton International is pretty well run, so it can’t just be written off as mere incompetence, can it?
I should point out, perhaps to their credit, that they are indeed incompetent over at Hilton corporate. I first dealt with Dioni Onguin, who made the mistake of accidntally CC’ing me on a nasty, ugly email to Karla Visconti. I guess I got to know how they really felt about me, and it wasn’t pretty. It was serious egg on their face (better than Paris enjoyed, and I do mean enjoyed,) but nothing they felt inclined to make up for.
By that point my seven-month window of opportunity had passed, so I had to choose to get nasty about it or let it go, and I chose to let it slide. Surely nobody would be this evil on purpose, right? Unless there is something more nefarious at work.
A year later I needed to work with them again, and I went straight to corporate. I dealt with Robert Allegrini, the corporate VP for corporate communications, who is as nice a guy as you could ever wish to talk to on the phone. I’d point out that his emails are somewhat less professional… how do I know this? Well, it’s evident in a number of ways:
1 – He CC’d me on the first round of emails, where he said things like “you should consider meeting with this guy” (emphasis his.) If he was being even keeled, he’d have emphasized nothing, but if he was trying to make up for past mistakes, he could have emphasized “should” instead of “consider.”
2 – He left me under the very direct, written impression for 6-months that I could schedule my tour around his properties, only to leave me hung out to dry (he wouldn’t even provide contact information for site managers,) and said that he couldn’t, wouldn’t and shouldn’t help me… um… You do know that I’m a travel writer, right?
3 – The two properties (out of more than a dozen) that agreed to meet with me showed me the emails he later sent them, which were discouraging at best, and didn’t even list my publication correctly, which again put to mind a question of malintent vs. outright incompetence. I checked my emails, I was very explicit about which publication I was representing.
4 – After the site visits were complete, I left more than 15 messages requesting Mr. Allegrini fact-check stories, all of which went unanswered.
5 – I tried on no fewer than 8 occasions to visit properties within driving distance of my Seatac home (no free rooms, no cash, no nothing,) and he wouldn’t even respond to my requests (though he once said he’d set them up.) These are what we like to call “a gimme”, so why the refusal to respond?
In terms of Robert Allegrini, there are only two possibilities. Either he’s working under direct orders from above telling him to give me the runaround for the stories I’d previously published about Paris, or he’s so stupid that he doesn’t realize that writers actually write, and that people actually read such stories. The problem there is that corporate communications have responded in the comments sections to stories, so surely that can’t be the case. I mean, seriously, he can’t ask his subordinates to respond to stories he believed would never be published, right?
Perhaps it’s pure coincidence that the same guy that wrote or published Paris Hilton Reps Assure Latest Scandal “Totally Isn’t” About Cocaine, Media Frenzy Overflows onto Paris Hilton’s Prosecutor’s Derelict Wife, and Larry King Gets Televised Fantasy Hour with Paris Hilton, Refuses to Pay amongst many others is coincidentally treated like the a bastard step-child by Hilton Hotels.
There are two possibilities here. Either they’re superbly evil, and shouldn’t be trusted with so much as your luggage, or they’re uncommonly evil, in which case you shouldn’t trust them with even a single night of your stay in any given city.
If I’m not banned because of things I’ve published about Paris, let’s let Hilton International respond by saying so much. And if not, let’s hear the reason, because plainly my assignments in each and every case met the minimum requirements from a corporate-level perspective.
I’m still voting for Paris for Vice President, by the way. And I’ve never bought or viewed her ill-famed video. I have more respect than that, or perhaps it’s more about the fact that I don’t support that sort of celebrity… or I guess, that sort of hotel. You know, fame for no reason, respect for no reason. Call it what you like.
And Bobby, this ain’t over by a mile. I tried to be your friend, extend the benefit of the doubt, but it just wasn’t meant to be. I spent almost four years trying to be your friend. Being my friend wouldn’t have cost you a penny, but keeping the Parisian conspiracy running, well, that’s going to cost you somewhat more than answering your phone. I hope it’s worth it, because your bosses now have the luxury of reading this as much as then 30,000+ readers of Glossy News.
Hilton is run by Nazis. Don’t support them.