Conservatives Disappointed w/ Palin Book: Thought “Going Rogue” Referred to Wearing Underwear

New York, NY: Legions of former Alaska Governor, Sara Palin, supporters reacted with disappointment with her new tell all book, “Going Rogue,” according to national opinion polls. The poll of approximately 5,000 self identified conservatives showed that while 52% “enjoyed the book,” and “agreed with its message and goals for America.” However, a whopping 87% expressed “disappointment” in that “the book failed to deliver what they expected to see.”

A spokesperson for the well respected national polling service, which conducted the survey, told BSNE the results indicate many conservatives misinterpreted the title of Palin’s book. According to the publisher and others close to Palin, “Going Rogue,” refers to Palin’s break with the traditional Republican Party and beltway power politics. However, many of those polled were, apparently, under the impression the book would be a photo essay exploring a rumored Palin decision “to no longer wear undergarments while in public.”

We interviewed several Palin supporters outside a local bookstore shortly after their purchase of the book. One man, who refused to be identified, pointed accusingly at the high gloss photos forming the center of the book and said, “What the hell is this! Just look at this… Pants… Pants… Pants… Oh! Now a skirt… Big deal! I can get this anywhere!” The gentleman then rushed back into the bookstore to demand his money back, contending the retailer was part of a liberal conspiracy to illegally edit the content of the book, and, “Make it all stupid.”

Glossy News asked another man expressing similar concerns after purchasing the book if he was perhaps misinterpreting “Going Rogue,” with “going commando,” the slang term for women not wearing underwear in public. The gentleman asserted this was not the case, “Well… No… I knew that the whole time…” He further contended his sudden drop in enthusiasm for the book could be attributed to a sudden attack of the Swine Flu, and that he would definitely still read the book “when I get around to it.”

In other news, several Internet bloggers are promising to digitally create the “expected photos” of Palin, in order to fill “an obvious need from her supporters.”


4 comments on “Conservatives Disappointed w/ Palin Book: Thought “Going Rogue” Referred to Wearing Underwear

  1. From reading excerpts of the book, one conclusion that is unavoidable is the woman’s jaw-dropping shallowness. When telling the story of how she was confronted at one point with news reports that she and her husband Todd were going to divorce, one would think (indeed one would hope) that she would offer for the reader’s contemplation a heartfelt description of her abiding love for her husband; how their union could not be tossed aside like some disposable camera – that she and Todd took their wedding vows seriously. No, there was none of that….

    “Dang, I thought. Divorce Todd? Have you SEEN Todd???”

    TRANSLATION: If Todd gains fifty pounds, he’s toast.

    Thirteen years into their marriage, Eleanor Roosevelt was confronted with her husband’s affair with her social secretary (and distant relative of mine – I come from a long line of home wreckers) Lucy Paige Mercer. After contemplating divorce, it was decided that they would continue their union. Years later, she confided to her friend, Joesph Lash, the reasons for saving their marriage. They were many and complicated. This, I can assure you, was not one of those reasons:

    “Dang, I thought. Divorce Franklin? Have you SEEN Franklin???”

    Ah, substance!

    Tom Degan
    Goshen, New York

  2. She’s an Autumn, so I think the coloring issue isn’t racist. I think it’s just evidence that she doesn’t know what colors to wear… Also I think she prefers chocolate.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *