Local clown, Giggles, 48, was left sopping wet and thoroughly embarrassed after leaning over to smell a nearby daffodil and was promptly sprayed in the face with a stream of water during a circus act. Giggles, momentarily caught off guard, violently shot back, stepped on to a conviniently-placed rake, and stiffened as the rake shot up and hit his body with a loud “THWAP.” Unfortunately for the veteran pantomime, his streak of comedically bad luck failed to end there, as he then turned around and received a vicious cream pie to the face from Paddywagon, the circus’s resident mischievous clown.
Though Giggles’s makeup held up remarkably well, his demeanor quickly deteriorated, and sounds of hysterical honks could be heard as he stumbled around the arena, crying and burying his face in his hands while the crowd cheered with excitment. Just as Giggles was regaining his
Composure, his comically-oversized trousers caught on a fishing hook maliciously cast by Paddywagon, and ripped clean off, exposing Giggles’s pink, polka-dotted boxers. The crowd was completely consumed with laughter as the other clowns proceeded to drag Giggles out of sight.
Sources report that it is unlikely Giggles will ever return to the circus and that his career as a harlequin has been dashed to pieces. “It was a really horrible thing of Paddywagon to kick him while he was down like that,” commented Giggles’s coworker, Bozo. Bozo also said there’s “no doubt” in his mind that Paddywagon planted the flower with the hope that Giggles would stop to smell it, calling the act “a despicable honkin’ thing to do.”
This is not the first time Paddywagon has been involved in “career sabotage,” according to circus ring leader Dash “Mr. Terrific” Dangerfield. “Giggles ain’t the first poor sucker that hooligan has gone after,” said Dangerfield. Last October, Giggles’s imaginary friend, Squiggles, was hospitalized after suffering three serious boo-boos and a big owie when Paddywagon ran over him in an overpacked clown car during a performance.
“It’s a clown eat clown world out here,” added Bozo. “Some folks just go straight for the juggler.”