New York City – Famous rapper Jay-Z thought he had it made. Married to one of the most famous people in the world, singer Beyonce, the wordsmith has been enjoying life since 2004 when he announced he only had ninety-nine problems.
That is hundreds fewer than the average person and he has made the most of his mostly carefree life ever since.
RIGHT: His shopping list is even longer… (CLICK TO ENLARGE.) Image appears courtesy of Steve Ryan at ElectricUnderpants.com.
But life has a way of maintaining balance in the universe and, like the old saying goes, sometimes when one door closes, another one opens.
This time it was an elevator door and, rather than another opportunity presenting itself, it was his sister-in-law from hell, Solange, raining down on him with some nasty language and her own version of MMA.
Dropping F-bombs, kicking and punching like a champ, Solange had to be restrained by a bodyguard. Jay-Z kept his cool and refrained from retaliating against the bitch. Beyonce also remained chill and allowed her sister to look the fool all by herself.
The famous couple seemed unsure of what set off the sister but some suspect Jay-Z had been taunting her about how he only had “99 problems,” and Solange said “You think you’re all that? I’ll give you problem number one hundred!”
Witnesses outside the fancy hotel where the incident occurred said that as the couple were climbing into their limo, the rapper muttered, “Stupid bitch. Now I’ve got to rework that damn song!”
I got problems too. My woman’s booty is twice as big as Beyotchsee’s. Her ass is so big, Spain tried to plant a flag in it. Somebody mock me. Please?
It really chaps me to read pieces that mock such great humanitarians all for the purpose of cheap amusement. Jay Z has been instrumental in behind the scenes international negotiations for years, and is a champion of world peace. He is single-handedly funding research to eliminate world hunger in our life time. He is elevating style to a level unseen since Pompei, pimping out his lovely wife for the good of adolescent males worldwide and had graciously given of himself to crowd music scene with his brand. What are you doing other than simply using him for pseudo-humor fodder?
Jay Z is beyond reproach to the point that he is married to Beyonce and he doesn’t even hit that. His monk-like demeanor may confuse imbeciles like whoever wrote this article, but it certainly is not lost on the illuminati and other higher minded people, none of which visit this site obviously.
Jealousy is not becoming of you so stop it. Jay Z is bigger than the Beatles and I mean better hung than all four of them put together. America is just not ready for a man of Jay Z’s magnitude as a black billionaire. What’s that, you say? Dr. Dre is the first hip-hop billionaire? Just screw you, you’re not the judge of me.
But, I will allow you to retort. Have at it, I will not reply. I give you the last word. Loser!
Thanks! Good article!
I like the photo idea. Good job!