Tag Archive | "President Obama"

Top Celebrities Pledge to Create Thousands of Entourage Jobs


Sid Weinstock, a savvy businessman from Los Angeles, has a list of some of the biggest names in the country who are each pledging to hire several new entourage members in an effort to create upwards of 100,000 new jobs in America in 2014. Justin Bieber has promised to add at least 20 new members to his entourage in the coming months. Auditions for the jobs will be taking place in Atlanta in January. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Celebrity GossipComments (0)

Drunken Obama Declares Prima Nocte


WASHINGTON — In a surprise move late last night, President Obama declared “Prima Nocte,” invoking the controversial 16th century feudal statute that allowed noblemen to “call dibs” on any newlywed bride during her first night of marriage.

According to the decree, local politicians – such as mayors and councilmen – reserve the right to procreate with other men’s new brides “freely and without consequence,” provided those young ladies are within their political constituency. Read the full story

Share

Posted in War ZoneComments (1)

Joe Biden Appointed Secretary of Intermoronical Affairs


Vice President Joe Biden has reason to smile.

Not only did the Delawarean Dynamo just get sworn into a second term of office; now Washington news organizations are reporting that Biden has been tapped to serve jointly as head of a new cabinet-level agency: the Department of Intermoronical Affairs. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Entertainment, PoliticsComments (1)

Obama Executive Order Forgives Teacher Debt


WASHINGTON DC–President Obama signed an executive order today forgiving college loan debt held by America’s public school teachers.

“Let me be perfectly clear. America’s teachers have worked too hard for far too long, for little pay and even less respect,” remarked the President. “As states like Florida continue to nickel and dime those who educate the youth of this country through legislative mandate of individual pension contributions, union-busting and underfunding of this nation’s schools, providing teachers financial relief–giving back to those who have given so much for so little in return–is a long-term investment in our schools and in our children.” Read the full story

Share

Posted in PoliticsComments (1)

Reason 17 I’m Voting Romney: I Like His Hair


GlossyNews.com[Note from the Staff of Glossy News: We proofread the author Tim Jones’ rant below about why he’s switching his vote from Obama to Romney.

We uncovered a few minor errors in his analysis and felt compelled to insert corrections as needed. – the Staff of Glossy News] Read the full story

Share

Posted in Opinon/Editorial, PoliticsComments (3)

Why Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann Could Never Be Democrats


Really I don’t understand why so many Liberals I have lots of admiration for get kinda ‘mouth foamy’ at the mention of Sarah Palin or Michelle Bachmann. My liberal friends seem to genuinely despise those two women. Myself, I don’t really hate anybody. Except for the guy who did that ‘Pina Colada” song; he should be water boarded. Read the full story

Share

Posted in PoliticsComments (13)

Republicans Claim Inheritance Tax Owed on Deficit Inherited from Bush


Republicans continue to assure the wealthiest Americans that no new taxes will be levied against them. However, with the Tea Party breathing down their necks and threatening to withhold votes if something isn’t done to get the budget under control, top Republican strategists have come up with a plan they believe will take on the appearance of bringing in some much-needed revenue. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Politics, Top StoriesComments (0)

Obama Not Reading Book Upside Down When Bin Laden Killed


It has already started, the “What were you doing when you heard the news that Osama bin Laden was killed?” Most of us were getting ready for bed or already there on a Sunday evening when the news broke. Not much else to remember, just that as soon as we heard, we couldn’t turn off the television. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Serious CommentaryComments (1)

Birthers Regroup After Minor Setback, Demand REAL Documents


Chastened by Obama’s release of the long form of his official birth certificate, leading proponents of the ‘birther’ movement (now officially dubbed ‘afterbirthers’) met today to rethink their strategy of trying to prove President Barack Obama is not a “natural-born citizen” of the United States. Proposals include:

1) Demanding to know whether Obama was delivered by cesarean section or by “natural” child-birth. Read the full story

Share

Posted in PoliticsComments (0)

President Obama Offers up Authentic Treasure Map to Throw Off Birther Scent


The quest for definitive evidence that Barack Obama was born (or not born) in the United States is heating up once again. This time, it is millionaire Donald Trump (or billionaire if you’re asking Trump himself) who is leading the scavenger hunt. Tired of all of the hubbub about where he was born, the President is finally taking matters into his own hands by offering up an authentic treasure map to throw Trump off the birther scent. Read the full story

Share

Posted in PoliticsComments (0)

O’Reilly, Obama Find Common Ground; Glenn Beck is Nuts


President Obama sat down with Fox News Show host Bill O’Reilly in a rare and candid interview that touched on everything from the unrest in Egypt and how it should be handled, the economy and how to achieve a more stable union, and Obama’s thoughts on the 2012 elections. But it was Glenn Beck that really brought the two men together in a meeting of the minds. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Entertainment, PoliticsComments (0)

Steps to Remedy Sophomoric Behavior Expected at SOTU Address


Whoever came up with the term “date night” to describe the seating arrangements anticipated at the President’s State of the Union Address on Tuesday night has a good handle on just how juvenile the behavior of some of our lawmakers has become. When it comes down to actually having to physically require Democrats to sit with Republicans and vice versa to give the appearance of bi-partisanship, we are in deep, deep trouble. Read the full story

Share

Posted in PoliticsComments (1)

Obama Signs New Jim Crow Bill into Law


Washington D.C. – Continuing a perfect record of being a doormat for the Neo-Fascists, President Obama signed a reverse civil rights bill into law today. Specifically, the bill addresses the ire of restaurant owners who are tired of serving pesky colored people, and gives a shot in the arm to drinking fountain and tacky sign manufacturers. Read the full story

Share

Posted in PoliticsComments (2)

President Obama Stars In ‘It’s A Wonderful Life’


President Obama gazed down from the icy bridge into the swirling frigid waters of the Potomac below him. In the darkness of the night the distance between him and its whirlpools seemed vast. He was at an end.

The difficulties of his Presidency seemed as dark, endless and foreboding as the waters he looked down upon. The constant assault and harassment by foes, the never ending undermining by the Republicans and the slings and arrows of a thousand misfortunes pulled the earth itself out from under him. Now even his own party was turning against him. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Entertainment, PoliticsComments (2)

Chicago High School Replaces Gym Equipment with Nintendo Wii Stations


Chicago, Ill – GlossyNews.com – Chicago’s George Washington High School is the first in the nation to bring its gymnasium into the 21st century by replacing all of its gym equipment, including balls, bats, paddles and nets with two big-screen Nintendo Wii Stations. The idea spun out of Michelle Obama’s drive to make the nation’s youth more active and stamp out the growing trend toward juvenile obesity. Read the full story

Share

Posted in Education, HealthComments (1)

Sarah Palin Applauds President Obama at Beck Rally


Sarah Palin gave a surprise second speech Saturday at Glenn Beck’s “Restore Honor” rally in Washington, D.C. In it, she praised President Obama for finally bringing our combat troops home from Iraq.

“As a mother of a combat soldier,” I want to thank President Obama personally for seeing to it that my son’s life and the lives of the soldiers still living are finally home safe and sound from Iraq. There has been too much bloodshed already. That is what this rally is all about.” Read the full story

Share

Posted in Politics, Top StoriesComments (1)

Page 1 of 212
Check out our friends:
Check out links to even more of our friends...
Want to see Your Link Here?



Glossy News Epic Mini Golf Trailer
(Comment on this video here)
-- (SEE ALL GlossyNews.com Videos) --



Visit the “Old Version” of our Site

     
Still want more? Find thousands of buried satirical gems in our archives on the old version of Glossy News!

Check This Out!

Our Top Authors (last 30-days)

8 posts
3 posts
3 posts
2 posts
2 posts


All of Our Categories:

Top Stories - Top Stories; Politics - Top Stories; Serious Commentary - Top Stories; World News - Top Stories; Biz News - Top Stories; War Zone | Horoscopes
Entertainment - Entertainment; Celebrity Gossip - Entertainment; Television - Entertainment; Music - Entertainment; Internet Tubes - Entertainment; Books, Newspapers & Misc - Entertainment; Movies
Society - Society; Health - Society; Crime - Society; Travel - Society; Crooked Cops - Society; Education - Society; Strange People - Society; Religionism - Society; Human Interest - Society; Kidz Zone
Science and Technology - Science and Technology; Science - Science and Technology; Technology - Science and Technology; Gadgets & Gizmos - Science and Technology; Environment
Sports - Sports; Scandals - Sports; Athletes - Sports; Events | All the Rest - News in Your Briefs - Making Headlines - Opinion/Editorial