University researchers have made a startling discovery after a routine colonoscopy of a 50 year old native American man revealed a phenomenon. The discovery is known in layman’s terms as….The Center of the Known Universe!

The true Theta Victa Gamma Globo, or Universe Center, has eluded researchers and scholars for over 500 years and was almost considered a fable. Now, with this recent discovery, researchers feel that true multi-dimensional time travel could be a reality in just a few short years. Read the full story

HOLLYWOODLAND, West Coast (GlossyNews) — Self-crowned ‘King of Directors’ James Cameron today announced a project expected to establish a new standard in cinema. Speaking from Malibu’s exclusive ‘Pssst, You can smoke in here’ Bistro, the mega-hit crafter was upbeat, while still maintaining his signature condescending tone. Read the full story

CHICAGO, Illinois (GlossyNews) — Things got a little strange Wednesday night in Chicago when a one-man act by the name of Arcus Temporis came on stage armed only with a chalkboard and a piece of chalk and an eraser.

“What is your name?” asked Piers Morgan of this wild-eyed man. In a Swedish accent, the man gave his name, “I am Arcus Temporis and I am 87 years olt,” he said as he took in the huge crowd he stood before.

“And what are you here to do for us tonight, Arcus?” said Piers. Read the full story

SEVRES, France (GlossyNews) — At their recent General Conference, the International Bureau of Weights and Measures (IBWM) chose to define the kilogram — roughly equal to about 2.2 lbs and the base unit of metric mass in standard scientific measurements and calculations — to be precicely 1/100th the mass of Travis Phillips, a warehouse manager for a Chicago-area Best Buy distribution center. Read the full story