Does the depressed economy have you feeling DOWN!!!!??? Are you concerned because our government can’t seem to solve our spiraling debt crisis? Confused about how to end the stalemate between Republicans and Democrats over how to restore America’s former greatness and still balance the budget? Read the full story

BMB Industries has introduced the new Black Momba Assault Rifle Kit claiming, ‘it can be assembled right in the peace and comfort of your own home using simple, everyday tools.’

The Black Momba kit, model M-160-B assault rifle, will be released for sale via online retailers tomorrow and will fill the needs of descriminating first-time gun owners in time for Christmas. Read the full story

Washington DC (GlossyNews) — The United States Supreme Court has declared that faceless corporations, now considered full citizens with all the rights of free speech and whatnot, can now openly carry their weapon of choice in public. During the hearing, a passionate argument was made against the inevitable ruling by a rag-tag liberal lawyer, Ernie Schliemann. In his argument, Schliemann attempted to make the case the U.S. Government, if infected by ultra right wing elements, might become a gun-carrying proxy for the military-industrial complex, leading to a fascist state in which the corporations control the government at the expense of individual rights. Read the full story

ANAHEIM, CA (GlossyNews) — On March 17, 2010, a three-year-old boy shot his father, an LAPD officer, with a service revolver. The shooting occurred in the family’s pickup truck at a traffic stop in Anaheim. Investigators are still trying to determine how the child got hold of the weapon. The father remains in critical condition. Read the full story

Philadelphia, PA (GlossyNews): An unnamed accused serial rapist demanded tougher gun control laws from his hospital bed in suburban Philadelphia earlier today, just hours after being admitted by police for a gun shot wound incurred while attempting to assault a local woman. Lawyers for the alleged rapist charged their client was “the real victim of this assault,” and warned that easy access to legal firearms was “[Making] committing a rape or other violent crime nearly impossible in many suburban areas.” Read the full story