RIO DE JANEIRO, Brazil (Glossy News) – News of the new Christ the King statue being erected in Swiebodzin, Poland that will be the tallest Christ statue in the world has Brazilians a bit ticked off. Brazil’s Christ the Redeemer statue in Rio de Janeiro has been regarded as one of the two tallest and most spectacular Christ statues in the world until now (Cristo de la Concordia statue in Bolivia is a tad taller). In fact, Christ the Redeemer is listed as one of the New Seven Wonders of the World. Read the full story

WEST CHESTER, PA. – The civilized world was gobsmacked yesterday by Jesus’ off-hand remark that there are roughly 150 people in heaven. That’s 1-to-the-5-plus-0, period, the population of septic fields like Armpit, New Mexico, and Chowder Falls, Wisconsin. If your brain hurts from trying to cope with the notion that there are fewer people in heaven than there are in Starbucks on a Sunday morning, try coping with this instead: if fewer than one one-bazillionth of one percent of all the people who have ever lived were good enough to get into heaven, you’re probably screwed. Read the full story