Congress has come under intense scrutiny in recent years for not reading the bills they pass. Regarding the recently passed health care bill Nancy Pelosi has gone on record stating “We have to pass the bill so that we can find out what is in it.”
She went on to admit “It’s sad, but despite our education most members of congress never learned to read. We are all functionally illiterate at best.” I applaud Pelosi’s courage for overcoming her embarrassment and revealing the true reason that Congress is not reading the bills that come before them.
Unfortunately the specter of illiteracy is not just limited to congress. It would seem that the vast majority of the Senate is having difficulty reading as well. Senator Rand Paul said “The senate is trying to sound out their words, but progress is slow. We have hired a tutor from Hooked on Phonics to teach English to Congress and the Senate.
Hopefully this will ensure that we actually read the laws we pass.” The Hill had great difficulty contacting Hooked on Phonics as they could not read the number 1-800 ABCDEFG. Fortunately they were able to get a congressional page to dial the number for them.
Senator Jim Webb has distinguished himself as the head of the class. His tutor has given him a gold star sticker on his latest spelling test. “Boy it sure is great to get a sticker on my test. I can’t wait to show my mommy,” Webb said. Other members of the legislative branch are wary of having to actually read things. Representative John Conyers said “What good is reading the bill if it’s a thousand pages. I didn’t buy my way through school for this.
You can’t expect me to actually read these bills.” According to Ross Baker, a political scientist at Rutgers “These bills are not written for even the educated layperson. They are written for specialists.” I can’t help but agree with Baker. It’s unreasonable to expect members of the legislative branch to be legal specialists. It’s not like they are involved in passing laws or anything.