General Reginald Johnson spoke warmly Tuesday at a missile silo in South Dakota to a battalion of nuclear armaments, saying "An exciting time has come upon us, after decades of rigorous preparation, we are about to move your training to the next level."

While many of the Intercontinental Ballistic Missiles (ICBM's) seemed apprehensive of the new plan, others grew anxious with anticipation, eager to do what must be done to help improve the world.

General Johnson continued, "This unique opportunity has not been seen since your comrades fought the last great war. Now is your chance to test your skills in a real world environment against enemy soldiers, tanks, trees, mosques, ozone, swing sets, camels and countries unfortunate enough to reside in the same ecosystem."

Some believe these tests, conducted above ground in a 1:1 scale using cities inhabited by actual persons could shed new lights on the long-term affects of living on earth during a nuclear holocaust. Many scientists are preparing special camera and recording devices to document and archive the survival of many roach species. This information could prove useful to visiting aliens in the future, or perhaps to a sentient race able to develop on earth again after a few million years.