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Toppled Statue Identity Confirmed, Hussein Body Double
Above: A photo, and right here; a caption. |
By
David CumtiThe statue brought down in Baghdad was not of Saddam Hussein, but one of his many body doubles, according to the CIA analysts.
The CIA employed past acquaintances of Hussein to view several hours of videotape on the event. They concluded that a true likeness of Hussein would have a larger waistline and more likely be wearing glasses.
"The search for the real Saddam statue will continue today," General Tommy Franks said. "Teams will be deployed throughout Baghdad, as well as a special ops team in his hometown of Tikrit."
Despite learning of the fake, several jubilant Iraqis continued their unabated pummeling of the statue's dismembered body. Several pairs of shoes were worn out during the show of disrespect. A young Iraqi man explained the scene to us with gusto.
"We don't care if it's not Saddam Hussein," he said. "I haven't had this much fun in a long time. But I've got to go-- There is much looting to for to be do."
The statue was toppled with the help of U.S. tank, driven by a young Marine in his first combat deployment.
"I just saw all these Iraqis pounding on the statue," he said. "They looked like they wanted to demolish the thing, so I told all my buddies, 'Lets go help out. It looks like a lot of fun.'"
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