Tag Archive | "water"

Catholic Congressman Steals Pope’s Water Glass


WASHINGTON – Congressman James Bath took advantage of his proximity to Pope Francis during his address to Congress to steal the Pope’s water glass and gulp some of the sacred Washington, DC tap water.

Luckily when the Pope’s throat went dry during his speech to Congress a quick-witted intern replaced the glass with a fresh one.

Bath explained: “It’s well worth it to break one of God’s Ten Holy Commandments in order to save my soul and the souls of my family by dousing myself and my family in the Pope’s holy water.”
“Because I have to be sure that it really is the Pope’s glass, I am having it tested for fingerprints and DNA —using devoutly Catholic forensic specialists naturally. If the immortal souls of these forensic scientists are also saved via their contact with this holy water glass — I won’t call it a holy grail exactly— I don’t have a problem with that. I suppose they deserve it.” Read the full story

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Cat Owners Have Hissy Fit Over New Ice Bucket Challenge


A new twist on the popular Facebook Ice Bucket Challenge, which raises money for Lou Gehrig’s Disease, has animal rights activists up in arms, legs and paws alike.

The trend, which started amongst celebrities and athletes and spread to Facebook, involves the participants dumping a bucket of ice or ice water over their heads and posting a video of it online to openly challenge their friends and foes to do the same. Read the full story

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Posted in Human Interest, SocietyComments (40)

Israel Protects Palestinian Land from Use


Uri Gnorant of the Israeli Bureau of Land Redemption was eager to see me. “I’m glad you’re here,” he said. “You reporters talk about how little we do for Palestinians. This is a chance to set the record straight. When it comes to environmental protection and conservation, no one could possibly do more than we do.

“Take water, for example. We have reduced Palestinian water consumption to less than a third of what it was in 1967. No place else in the world can boast such an accomplishment. Even we Israelis cannot match it. Read the full story

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Posted in EnvironmentComments (0)

Bottled Water Making Its Way to Alaska- Like Taking Mountains to Mohammed


Bottled water- who could ever, outside of professional con men such as P.T. Barnum and Soapy Smith, would ever have thought that it would be possible to put water in a bottle and actually get someone to buy it, except, perhaps nomads crossing the Sahara (they, however, did not have bottles until recently and even those are bleached out ones that have floated across the Mediterranean from Spain.

They did have goat skin bags, but these tended to make the water taste gamey and therefore hard to sell). Read the full story

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Posted in HealthComments (2)

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