Tag Archive | "Queen Elizabeth II"

When Donald Met Nigel (A Comic Dialogue in Two Annoying Parts)


NOTE FROM WALLACE: Welcome Appleseed Ike, of Satirical Industrial Complex! This is Ike’s first piece for Glossy News.

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When you hear about a meeting between Donald and Nigel you’d stereotypically picture two ageing, dogmatic men. What happens is far worse than a stereotype.

D- Hey British guy, why don’t you start by telling me about your crooked plan to get rid of Theresa May… not be very good for Britain. Ha. They can’t imagine it! Sad.

N- Well, it’s quite genius really. First you show some turbulence between the USA and Britain. This will create worry and confusion because of Brexit…

D- I love Brexit. Awesome! They tell me about Brexit. I know Brexit. Nobody does Brexit better than the Donald. Read the full story

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Purr Gate


David Cameron coughed up a fur ball this week when he told ex-mayor of New York, Michael Bloomberg that the Queen “purred” when she had heard the result of the Scottish Referendum.

During this conversation it has also been revealed that whilst the Queen purred like a cat, Prince Philip could be heard barking like a raving lunatic in a basket of used tissues.

“So she was purring, right?” says Cameron “I then I thought one of the corgis had got her but then it shouted out something racist.” Read the full story

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Queen Tweets Her Way through the Opening Ceremonies


LONDON–Through a little investigative journalism here and a little bribe there, Iron E-News was able to obtain the royal jewel of news: The Queen’s Tweets.

Unbeknownst to most of the world, her majesty has a secret Twitter account and, since 2009, has become an avid contributor under the codename Intrnt Hpstr.

We have the exclusive and complete list of tweets and are very happy to share them with you: Read the full story

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Engraved Tax Bills Sent To British Taxpayers on Eve of Royal Wedding


Reports are coming out of England that part of the cost of throwing one of the most lavish weddings of the decade will be borne by British taxpayers. Unfortunately, with the economy pretty much still on a downward slide, this news could not have come at a worse time for the royal subjects.

To soften the blow, the Queen has come up with a plan that she hopes will take the sting out of bearing some of the burden for a wedding that is rumored to be overpriced and which most of them may only get to attend by watching it on the telly. Read the full story

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‘Do Over’ Planned As Britain Finally Challenges Revolutionary War Outcome


Citing dissatisfaction over the outcome of the Revolutionary War, the British Crown has decided that a ‘do-over’ would be in best interests of both countries.

In order to spark a bit of controversy, her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II has arranged for 30 UK citizens dressed as Pakastani shop keepers to throw thousands of crates of Coca-Cola into the Thames River on Friday night, followed by forcing US sightseers to go to the rear of all lines at most tourist destinations in London. Read the full story

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Posted in Politics, War ZoneComments (2)

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