Glossy News Future Take: Year 2024 — Most political analysts look upon the 2012 Obama-Palin campaign as the start of the anarchy that now besets us. Originally known as the second Obama-McCain campaign, Palin soon eclipsed her boss in popularity as was well-remembered by the 98% female majority in the House and Senate that is now disbanded.

McCain’s mysterious demise two days into his Presidency started the path of female dominance. Read the full story

PHOENIX, AZ — Former Faux-Con presidential candidate and current Senator John McCain is running scared in his home state these days against a teabagger-type radio talkshow host who boasts of his plans to put Senator McCain down!

“Nothin’ doin’! This guy ain’t gonna take MY Senate seat away from me,” said a disgruntled McCain at a press conference today. “I’m bringin’ in the big guns here. Scott and Sarah. It’s high noon! The two top vote getters in the whole country are comin’ in to help get me — yes, me, re-elected.” Read the full story

Senator John McCain’s fierce stance against repealing the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” law has brought about speculation of his hatred for homosexuals. While McCain cites the hardships that military members face in Iraq and Afghanistan, many others are accusing the senator of attempting to bury his own skeletons. Read the full story

A thoroughly entertaining book, The Game Change, has brought to light some “wish we hadn’t said that” moments from almost everyone associated with the 2008 Presidential campaign scene. So I just couldn’t wait to get my hands on a copy to see for myself what all the hubbub was about, especially when I heard that Harry Reid, the gosh-darn nicest, I-don’t-have-a-racist-bone-in-my-body kinda guy is credited with the now infamous line spoken when he was trying to make the case that the country was ready for a black presidential candidate…and referred to Obama as a “light-skinned African American with no Negro dialect, unless he wanted to have one.” Read the full story

God, highest imagined power in all the universe, perhaps best known as the creator of day and night, took a few minutes away from his daily chore of answering billions of prayers for wealth, fame and sexual partners to publicly address a persistent request from one of his most visible, though least faithful followers, John McCain. “No,” said God, with a chorus of angels in accompaniment. “I will not honor the requests of you or Sarah Palin. Sorry. I have bigger things to deal with and you should stop praying to me for this.” Read the full story