WHY Iran? (Parody of a Mark Knopfler Classic, with Apologies to the Current President of Syria)

CIA had no way of staying afloat
Gotta bomb them Syrian warboats
Never mind the refugees
We blitzin’ them Syrians like Germany
We created the Taliban
And we’ll drop chlorine o’er a’ the land
We got dodgy dossiers and tabloid fear
Bombing kids from Kabul to aye reet here

Why Iran, why aye, why aye man
Why aye man, why aye, why not Iran

Wah soldiers of fortune, makin’ our wars
But the lads who fight are other childrens’ boys
If we throw enough mud it’ll surely stick
Like the jizz from Old Slick Willie’s Dick
We kill Arabs, Serbians, aye why not?
Look at a’ the oil we got
Petroleum, naptha, kerosene
Made in hellfire, reet funny scene!

Why Iran, why aye, why aye man
Why aye man, why aye, why not Iran

Getting rich off them heroin farms
Cookin’ kiddies’ kidneys like a Wigan barm
ISIS are good at choppin’ heads
We bomb nursery schools instead
There’s plenty of widows here to burn
Just look at all the swag I’ve earned
Never mind the ICC
Incineratin’ infants? Areet wi’ me!
Waitin’ for ma next cocaine line
Heaped up skeletons smokin’ just fine
Tonight we’ll bomb the old town level
Drink to me, yer reet clever devil

Why Iran  why aye, why aye man
Why aye man, why aye, why not Iran

Author: Wallace Runnymede

Wallace is the editor of Brian K. White's epic website, Glossy News! Email him with your content at wallacerunnymede#gmail.com (Should be @, not #!) Or if you'd like me to help you tease out some ideas that you can't quite put into concrete form, I'd love to have some dialogue with you! Catch me on Patreon too, or better still, help out our great writers on the official Glossy News Patreon (see the bottom of the homepage!) Don't forget to favourite Glossy News in your browser, and like us on Facebook too! And last but VERY MUCH not the least of all... Share, share, SHARE! Thanks so much for taking the time to check out our awesome site!