Aries: Your love of casual nudity and disregard for the warning labels on table saws will bring you a certain amount of fame in the medical community this week. Henceforth, genital reattachment after an industrial accident will be known as an “insert your name here” procedure.
Taurus: The Stars realize your ego might be taking a hit. However, they think you should just accept the free electrolysis being offered by several beach resorts as a condition of your visit this summer. Read the full story