Tag Archive | "friendship"

Friend Just Hasn’t Been the Same Since He Won That Free Pepsi


COLORADO SPRINGS, CO—Colorado Springs resident Wayne Gallaway reported earlier today that his friend, Spencer Buckner, has let the fact that Buckner won a free Pepsi from the bottle cap of another Pepsi go completely to his head.

“I just don’t know who he is anymore,” said Gallaway.

Gallaway went on to describe the generally negative changes in Buckner’s behavior since he acquired the complimentary beverage. Read the full story

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Facebooker Relieved Not to Give Damn About Any of Seven Friends Whose Birthday It Is Today


CAMDEN, N.J. — Area Facebook User Griff Paley reported earlier this morning that he is very much relieved to see that, of the seven Facebook friends who are celebrating birthdays today, there isn’t a single one among them about whom he gives a shit.

Paley, who woke up early to browse the social media site before his morning shower, glanced at the list of birthdays before concluding that none of the names in front of him merited spending the approximately-four-seconds it takes to wish them well. Read the full story

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Kim Jong Il Crush on Bill Richardson Intensifies after Latest Visit


Kim Jong Il is said to still be talking about the wonderful visit he had with his “American GI buddy” earlier this month.

Those who know Kim Jong Il intimately claim that it was no coincidence that Richardson was chosen to travel to North Korea to discuss various issues concerning nuclear power and tension with South Korea. They say Kim has a huge “man crush” on New Mexico Gov. Bill Richardson. Read the full story

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