INDIANAPOLIS – A cocktail party took just two hours to deteriorate into a fledgling political party Monday, after the event’s laid-back atmosphere took on a more serious and philosophical tone.
Guests arrived at The Hilton Indianapolis Hotel in buoyant mood, expecting a productive night of alcohol consumption and networking.
However, events took a swift turn after one guest made a single reference to the 2006 Military Commissions Act, spawning an all night discussion on the topic of government legislation.
“One minute I was enjoying the fine ambiance of the occasion”, said 31-year-old insurance broker Wade Kaminsky, “when suddenly I was dragged into a really heated debate about the constitutionality of Roe vs. Wade. I just… I’ve no idea what happened.”
While simultaneously removing whipped cream from his face, party host Jason Atkinson “couldn’t resist” getting involved in another similarly politically-charged discussion, after overhearing his friend and colleague Dan Silverman defending former President George W. Bush’s decision to go to war in Iraq.
“I wasn’t about to let him get away with some of the things he was coming out with”, said Atkinson. “Before I knew it I was countering each of his points with step by step citations from the 2003 Iraq Dossier. I remember a lot of people leaving soon after that.”
The night ended with the three remaining guests naively vowing to establish their own political party; an idea that was quickly forgotten after one of the members vomited in the fish tank.