Tag Archive | "blood diamonds"

Tea Party Calls for Deportation Of Illegal South African Minors


In a rare show of solidarity, three major Tea Party groups have come together and issued a joint statement calling for the arrest and deportation of illegal minors in South Africa.

“Illegals are law breaking free loaders who steal jobs and drain public coffers while contributing little to decent white colonial societies.

That they are under age is a great abomination to people who hold traditional values about family, marriage, abortion, a woman’s place in the home and who have a justifiable fear of God.”

The statement went on to say “South Africa’s natural resources make it a gold mine for parasites and this is a prime example of what happens when a nation fails to secure it’s borders.

“South Africa is overrun with illegal minors…smelly, short, brown and uneducated who just traipsed right in because real South Africans didn’t have the God given balls to build an electrified fence across it’s southern border”.

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Abusive Boyfriend Proposes With “Conflict-Free” Diamond to Show He Has Sense of Humor, Too


MADISON, W. VA. — Local 24 Year Old Jeffrey Kiln recently proposed to Ashley Brenevaldi with a certified “conflict-free” diamond ring in an effort to show that, in addition to his constant physically, mentally and emotionally abusive behavior toward his longtime girlfriend, he also generally has a pretty good sense of humor about things, sources report. Read the full story

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Cameroon Corruption: Force 9 on Beaufort Scale


Amidst a growing maelstrom of rumour, gossip and scandal Cameroon’s security chief Rastus Chuckabutty has finally admitted some 300,000 people hoping to get jobs in the police force have written, phoned or e-mailed him directly begging for preferential treatment – most of them his relatives – or someone related to someone who knows someone else who knew someone his mother used to buy voodoo dolls from. Read the full story

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